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Have you ever seen people so ugly that you have to get someone else to...

Have you ever seen people so ugly that you have to get someone else to...

I had to perform at the White House for the president, That's always kind of...

I had to perform at the White House for the president, That's always kind of...

I know God is real. I know if mama ain't happy, ain't nobody happy.

I know God is real. I know if mama ain't happy, ain't nobody happy.

I really don't require a whole lot in life.

I really don't require a whole lot in life.

I refuse to this day to do e-mail because everybody I know that does it,...

I refuse to this day to do e-mail because everybody I know that does it,...

I tried real hard to play golf, and I was so bad at it they...

I tried real hard to play golf, and I was so bad at it they...

I turned down a movie this summer because it was nine weeks in Vancouver and...

I turned down a movie this summer because it was nine weeks in Vancouver and...

I used to say that whenever people heard my Southern accent, they always wanted to...

I used to say that whenever people heard my Southern accent, they always wanted to...

I have never been jealous. Not even when my dad finished fifth grade a year...

I have never been jealous. Not even when my dad finished fifth grade a year...

My wife is so analytical with raising kids, and I am not. My feeling is...

My wife is so analytical with raising kids, and I am not. My feeling is...

Did you know babies are nauseated by the smell of a clean shirt?

Did you know babies are nauseated by the smell of a clean shirt?

Nothing in life prepares you to be famous.

Nothing in life prepares you to be famous.

Find something in life that you love doing. If you make a lot of money,...

Find something in life that you love doing. If you make a lot of money,...

Now, it's true I married my wife for her looks... but not the ones she's...

Now, it's true I married my wife for her looks... but not the ones she's...

For the first time ever I was taking the family on the road. We stayed...

For the first time ever I was taking the family on the road. We stayed...

People would say, Can we develop a sitcom around you? and I would say, Not...

People would say, Can we develop a sitcom around you? and I would say, Not...

Pride is the first step in people unraveling and companies unraveling and relationships unraveling.

Pride is the first step in people unraveling and companies unraveling and relationships unraveling.

That's the great thing about a tractor. You can't really hear the phone ring.

That's the great thing about a tractor. You can't really hear the phone ring.