If I am still standing at the end of the race, hit me with a board and knock me down, because that means I didnt run hard enough.

Quote by Steve Jones

Topics: Funny Quotes, Running Quotes

My girlfriend always laughs during sex -- no matter what she's reading.

My girlfriend always laughs during sex -- no matter what she's reading.

Ours is the age which is proud of machines that think and suspicious of men...

Ours is the age which is proud of machines that think and suspicious of men...

Remember, today is the tomorrow you worried about yesterday.

Remember, today is the tomorrow you worried about yesterday.

You're not drunk if you can lie on the floor without holding on.

You're not drunk if you can lie on the floor without holding on.

You think it horrible that lust and rage Should dance attendance upon my old age;...

You think it horrible that lust and rage Should dance attendance upon my old age;...

Now the peak of summer's past, the sky is overcast And the love we swore...

Now the peak of summer's past, the sky is overcast And the love we swore...

I am free of all prejudices. I hate everyone equally.

I am free of all prejudices. I hate everyone equally.

Marriage is really tough because you have to deal with feelings ... and lawyers.

Marriage is really tough because you have to deal with feelings ... and lawyers.

Accomplishing the impossible means only the boss will add it to your regular duties.

Accomplishing the impossible means only the boss will add it to your regular duties.

Happy Leap Day! Use it to do something adventurous that you'd never normally do! Now...

Happy Leap Day! Use it to do something adventurous that you'd never normally do! Now...

Man has no Body distinct from his Soul; for that called Body is a portion...

Man has no Body distinct from his Soul; for that called Body is a portion...

Sex education may be a good idea in the schools, but I don't believe the...

Sex education may be a good idea in the schools, but I don't believe the...

Man reaches the highest point of lovableness at 12 to 17 - to get it...

Man reaches the highest point of lovableness at 12 to 17 - to get it...

Let's reintroduce corporal punishment in the schools - and use it on the teachers.

Let's reintroduce corporal punishment in the schools - and use it on the teachers.

I'd be happy if I could think that the role of the library was sustained...

I'd be happy if I could think that the role of the library was sustained...

Your body is the baggage you must carry through life. The more excess the baggage,...

Your body is the baggage you must carry through life. The more excess the baggage,...

I'd rather have a bottle in front of me, than a frontal lobotomy.

I'd rather have a bottle in front of me, than a frontal lobotomy.

I sang in the choir for years, even though my family belonged to another church.

I sang in the choir for years, even though my family belonged to another church.

Running has never failed to give me great end results, and that's why I keep...

Running has never failed to give me great end results, and that's why I keep...

To win means nothing without the will to prepare.

To win means nothing without the will to prepare.