If I am still standing at the end of the race, hit me with a board and knock me down, because that means I didnt run hard enough.

Quote by Steve Jones

Topics: Funny Quotes, Running Quotes

Why don't they make the whole plane out of that black box stuff.

Why don't they make the whole plane out of that black box stuff.

I can stand brute force, but brute reason is quite unbearable. There is something unfair...

I can stand brute force, but brute reason is quite unbearable. There is something unfair...

History is the version of past events that people have decided to agree upon.

History is the version of past events that people have decided to agree upon.

No one has ever come back from the other world. I can't console you, but...

No one has ever come back from the other world. I can't console you, but...

Give me golf clubs, fresh air and a beautiful partner, and you can keep the...

Give me golf clubs, fresh air and a beautiful partner, and you can keep the...

Someone introduce me to whoever invented Mornings. I will beat the shit out of them.

Someone introduce me to whoever invented Mornings. I will beat the shit out of them.

About age 30 most women think about having children, most men think about dating them.

About age 30 most women think about having children, most men think about dating them.

In an age in which the media broadcast countless pieces of foolishness, the educated man...

In an age in which the media broadcast countless pieces of foolishness, the educated man...

I wish I could think of a positive point to leave you with. Will you...

I wish I could think of a positive point to leave you with. Will you...

I think my fans will follow me into our combined old age. Real musicians and...

I think my fans will follow me into our combined old age. Real musicians and...

Mr. Right's coming.. but he's in Africa and he's walking!

Mr. Right's coming.. but he's in Africa and he's walking!

How can I believe in God when only last week I got my tongue caught...

How can I believe in God when only last week I got my tongue caught...

The only war we ever had was the time we ran out of Mr Kipling...

The only war we ever had was the time we ran out of Mr Kipling...

Your services might be as useful as a barbershop on the steps of a guillotine.

Your services might be as useful as a barbershop on the steps of a guillotine.

Men will confess to treason, murder, arson, false teeth, or a wig. How many of...

Men will confess to treason, murder, arson, false teeth, or a wig. How many of...

Had I but served my God with half the zeal I served my king, he...

Had I but served my God with half the zeal I served my king, he...

Sex is like art. Most of it is pretty bad, and the good stuff is...

Sex is like art. Most of it is pretty bad, and the good stuff is...

You can judge your age by the amount of pain you feel when you come...

You can judge your age by the amount of pain you feel when you come...

Ask yourself: 'Can I give more?'. The answer is usually: 'Yes'.

Ask yourself: 'Can I give more?'. The answer is usually: 'Yes'.

Great people and great athletes realize early in their lives their destiny, and accept it....

Great people and great athletes realize early in their lives their destiny, and accept it....