I believe in eight of the ten commandments; and I believe in going to church every Sunday unless there's a game on

Quote by Steve Martin

Topics: Belief Quotes

Comedy is the art of making people laugh without making them puke

Comedy is the art of making people laugh without making them puke

Love is a promise delivered already broken.

Love is a promise delivered already broken.

Comedy may be big business but it isn't pretty.

Comedy may be big business but it isn't pretty.

A day without sunshine is like, you know, night.

A day without sunshine is like, you know, night.

Boy, those French: they have a different word for everything!

Boy, those French: they have a different word for everything!

I think I did pretty well, considering I started out with nothing but a bunch...

I think I did pretty well, considering I started out with nothing but a bunch...

First the doctor told me the good news: I was going to have a disease...

First the doctor told me the good news: I was going to have a disease...

I believe entertainment can aspire to be art, and can become art, but if you...

I believe entertainment can aspire to be art, and can become art, but if you...

I handed in a script last year and the studio didn't change one word. The...

I handed in a script last year and the studio didn't change one word. The...

An apology? Bah! Disgusting! Cowardly! Beneath the dignity of any gentleman, however wrong he might...

An apology? Bah! Disgusting! Cowardly! Beneath the dignity of any gentleman, however wrong he might...

Hosting the Oscars is much like making love to a woman. It's something I only...

Hosting the Oscars is much like making love to a woman. It's something I only...

I like a woman with a head on her shoulders. I hate necks.

I like a woman with a head on her shoulders. I hate necks.

What is comedy? Comedy is the art of making people laugh without making them puke.

What is comedy? Comedy is the art of making people laugh without making them puke.

Well, excuuuuuse me!

Well, excuuuuuse me!

I've got to keep breathing. It'll be my worst business mistake if I don't.

I've got to keep breathing. It'll be my worst business mistake if I don't.

I believe that Ronald Reagan will someday make this country what it once was... an...

I believe that Ronald Reagan will someday make this country what it once was... an...

There is one thing I would break up over and that is if she caught...

There is one thing I would break up over and that is if she caught...

Chaos in the midst of chaos isn't funny, but chaos in the midst of order...

Chaos in the midst of chaos isn't funny, but chaos in the midst of order...

Every passion borders on the chaotic, but the collector's passion borders on the chaos of...

Every passion borders on the chaotic, but the collector's passion borders on the chaos of...

We have traded a dictator for a chaos that has left America less secure.

We have traded a dictator for a chaos that has left America less secure.