Eloquence, n. The art of orally persuading fools that white is the color that it appears to be. It includes the gift of making any color appear white.

Quote by Ambrose Bierce

Topics: Ambrose Bierce Quotes

Habit is a shackle for the free.

Habit is a shackle for the free.

Photograph: a picture painted by the sun without instruction in art.

Photograph: a picture painted by the sun without instruction in art.

BRANDY, n. A cordial composed of one part thunder-and-lightning, one part remorse, two parts bloody...

BRANDY, n. A cordial composed of one part thunder-and-lightning, one part remorse, two parts bloody...

Spring beckons! All things to the call respond; the trees are leaving and cashiers abscond.

Spring beckons! All things to the call respond; the trees are leaving and cashiers abscond.

Laziness. Unwarranted repose of manner in a person of low degree.

Laziness. Unwarranted repose of manner in a person of low degree.

MINSTREL, adj. Formerly a poet, singer or musician; now a nigger with a color less...

MINSTREL, adj. Formerly a poet, singer or musician; now a nigger with a color less...

FUNERAL, n. A pageant whereby we attest our respect for the dead by enriching the...

FUNERAL, n. A pageant whereby we attest our respect for the dead by enriching the...

COMMERCE, n. A kind of transaction in which A plunders from B the goods of...

COMMERCE, n. A kind of transaction in which A plunders from B the goods of...

Optimism: The doctrine that everything is beautiful, including what is ugly, everything good, especially the...

Optimism: The doctrine that everything is beautiful, including what is ugly, everything good, especially the...

Love: A temporary insanity curable by marriage.

Love: A temporary insanity curable by marriage.

Edible - good to eat and wholesome to digest, as a worm to a toad,...

Edible - good to eat and wholesome to digest, as a worm to a toad,...

Bigot: One who is obstinately and zealously attached to an opinion that you do not...

Bigot: One who is obstinately and zealously attached to an opinion that you do not...

Architect. One who drafts a plan of your house, and plans a draft of your...

Architect. One who drafts a plan of your house, and plans a draft of your...

To be positive is to be mistaken at the top of one's voice.

To be positive is to be mistaken at the top of one's voice.

Rum, n. Generically, fiery liquors that produce madness in total abstainers.

Rum, n. Generically, fiery liquors that produce madness in total abstainers.

DOG, n. A kind of additional or subsidiary Deity designed to catch the overflow and...

DOG, n. A kind of additional or subsidiary Deity designed to catch the overflow and...

CIRCUS, n. A place where horses, ponies and elephants are permitted to see men, women...

CIRCUS, n. A place where horses, ponies and elephants are permitted to see men, women...

Famous, adj.: Conspicuously miserable.

Famous, adj.: Conspicuously miserable.

My idea of a good picture is one that's in focus and of a famous...

My idea of a good picture is one that's in focus and of a famous...

You go to school, you get a master's degree, you study Shakespeare and you wind...

You go to school, you get a master's degree, you study Shakespeare and you wind...