Famous, adj.: Conspicuously miserable.
Quote by Ambrose Bierce
When you doubt, abstain.
Bigot: One who is obstinately and zealously attached to an opinion that you do not...
Income is the natural and rational gauge and measure of respectability.
REVELATION, n. A famous book in which St. John the Divine concealed all that he...
The hardest tumble a man can make is to fall over his own bluff.
Beauty, n: the power by which a woman charms a lover and terrifies a husband.
Scriptures: the sacred books of our holy religion, as distinguished from the false and profane...
Pain: an uncomfortable frame of mind that may have a physical basis in something that...
CUPID, n. The so-called god of love. This bastard creation of a barbarous fancy was...
Admiral. That part of a warship which does the talking while the figurehead does the...
Patience, n. A minor form of dispair, disguised as a virtue.
Liberty: One of Imagination's most precious possessions.
Learning, n. The kind of ignorance distinguishing the studious.
FORMA PAUPERIS. [Latin] In the character of a poor person --a method by which a...
Telephone, n. An invention of the devil which abrogates some of the advantages of making...
Laziness. Unwarranted repose of manner in a person of low degree.
Bore, n. A person who talks when you wish him to listen.
Electricity is the power that causes all natural phenomena not known to be caused by...
Imagination has brought mankind through the dark ages to its present state of civilization. Imagination...
If it weren't for electricity we'd all be watching television by candlelight.
A good intention clothes itself with power