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MUMMY, n. An ancient Egyptian, formerly in universal use among modern civilized nations as medicine,...
#Ambrose Bierce
Backbite. To speak of a man as you find him when he can't find you.
#Ambrose Bierce
Barometer, n.: An ingenious instrument which indicates what kind of weather we are having.
#Ambrose Bierce
Battle, n., A method of untying with the teeth a political knot that would not...
#Ambrose Bierce
Beauty, n: the power by which a woman charms a lover and terrifies a husband.
#Ambrose Bierce
A man is known by the company he organizes.
#Ambrose Bierce
A person who doubts himself is like a man who would enlist in the ranks...
#Ambrose Bierce
An egotist is a person of low taste - more interested in himself than in...
#Ambrose Bierce
Anoint, v.: To grease a king or other great functionary already sufficiently slippery.
#Ambrose Bierce
Architect. One who drafts a plan of your house, and plans a draft of your...
#Ambrose Bierce
Ardor, n. The quality that distinguishes love without knowledge.
#Ambrose Bierce
Bacchus, n.: A convenient deity invented by the ancients as an excuse for getting drunk.
#Ambrose Bierce
Abstainer: a weak person who yields to the temptation of denying himself a pleasure.
#Ambrose Bierce
Absurdity, n.: A statement or belief manifestly inconsistent with one's own opinion.
#Ambrose Bierce
Academe, n.: An ancient school where morality and philosophy were taught. Academy, n.: A modern...
#Ambrose Bierce
Acquaintance. A person whom we know well enough to borrow from, but not well enough...
#Ambrose Bierce
Admiral. That part of a warship which does the talking while the figurehead does the...
#Ambrose Bierce
Admiration, n. Our polite recognition of another's resemblance to ourselves.
#Ambrose Bierce
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