A good college is like unprotected sex: Glad you got in, wish you never came.

Topics: College Quotes, Funny Quotes, Sex Quotes

That f*ck my life moment when the only answers you know on the test are...

That f*ck my life moment when the only answers you know on the test are...

Going to college offered me the chance to play football for four more years.

Going to college offered me the chance to play football for four more years.

Faking the dates on your work so it doesn't look like you did it last...

Faking the dates on your work so it doesn't look like you did it last...

In school, group projects only taught me one thing: How much I hate other people.

In school, group projects only taught me one thing: How much I hate other people.

I even lived on campus to get the college experience. I had five roommates and...

I even lived on campus to get the college experience. I had five roommates and...

I was working all the time I was in college. I was working so much...

I was working all the time I was in college. I was working so much...

One of the great mind destroyers of college education is the belief that if it's...

One of the great mind destroyers of college education is the belief that if it's...

You never really realize how awesomely well stocked your parent's fridge is until you move...

You never really realize how awesomely well stocked your parent's fridge is until you move...

My undergraduate education, at the City College in New York, was made possible only by...

My undergraduate education, at the City College in New York, was made possible only by...

We changed the names of our technical schools to colleges, we expanded the eligibility for...

We changed the names of our technical schools to colleges, we expanded the eligibility for...

Earnestness is stupidity sent to college.

Earnestness is stupidity sent to college.

When we make college more affordable, we make the American dream more achievable.

When we make college more affordable, we make the American dream more achievable.

If you don't give your kid freedom to make choices with money, including stupid choices,...

If you don't give your kid freedom to make choices with money, including stupid choices,...

I had one of my good friends kicked out of college for domestic violence. He...

I had one of my good friends kicked out of college for domestic violence. He...

Graduation Speech: I'd like to thank the internet, Google, Wikipedia, Microsoft Word, and Copy &...

Graduation Speech: I'd like to thank the internet, Google, Wikipedia, Microsoft Word, and Copy &...

Earnestness is stupidity sent to college.

Earnestness is stupidity sent to college.

Exams don't test what you know. They test how well you can study the night...

Exams don't test what you know. They test how well you can study the night...

I miss the days in college when my alarm clock would be set in the...

I miss the days in college when my alarm clock would be set in the...

Life is like stepping onto a boat which is about to sail out to sea...

Life is like stepping onto a boat which is about to sail out to sea...

There has never been an age that did not applaud the past and lament the...

There has never been an age that did not applaud the past and lament the...

If you have someone that loves you...appreciate it because every since sex came easy, love...

If you have someone that loves you...appreciate it because every since sex came easy, love...