A good college is like unprotected sex: Glad you got in, wish you never came.

Topics: College Quotes, Funny Quotes, Sex Quotes

If I'd stayed at college I would have become a teacher.

If I'd stayed at college I would have become a teacher.

Students, with the beginning of the new semester, remember; Good grades, enough sleep, a social...

Students, with the beginning of the new semester, remember; Good grades, enough sleep, a social...

Let me say no danger and no hardship ever makes me wish to get back...

Let me say no danger and no hardship ever makes me wish to get back...

I enjoyed high school and college, and I think I learned a lot, but that...

I enjoyed high school and college, and I think I learned a lot, but that...

I had one of my good friends kicked out of college for domestic violence. He...

I had one of my good friends kicked out of college for domestic violence. He...

One of the great mind destroyers of college education is the belief that if it's...

One of the great mind destroyers of college education is the belief that if it's...

Graduation Speech: I'd like to thank the internet, Google, Wikipedia, Microsoft Word, and Copy &...

Graduation Speech: I'd like to thank the internet, Google, Wikipedia, Microsoft Word, and Copy &...

Successful colleges will start laying plans for a new stadium; unsuccessful ones will start hunting...

Successful colleges will start laying plans for a new stadium; unsuccessful ones will start hunting...

Faking the dates on your work so it doesn't look like you did it last...

Faking the dates on your work so it doesn't look like you did it last...

When bright young minds can't afford college, America pays the price.

When bright young minds can't afford college, America pays the price.

I was working all the time I was in college. I was working so much...

I was working all the time I was in college. I was working so much...

In school, group projects only taught me one thing: How much I hate other people.

In school, group projects only taught me one thing: How much I hate other people.

I miss the days in college when my alarm clock would be set in the...

I miss the days in college when my alarm clock would be set in the...

That f*ck my life moment when the only answers you know on the test are...

That f*ck my life moment when the only answers you know on the test are...

Don't do drugs kids. There's a time and place for everything. It's called college.

Don't do drugs kids. There's a time and place for everything. It's called college.

One of the great mind destroyers of college education is the belief that if it's...

One of the great mind destroyers of college education is the belief that if it's...

Earnestness is stupidity sent to college.

Earnestness is stupidity sent to college.

Eating Taco Bell is like sleeping with your ex. I feel horrible afterwards and I'm...

Eating Taco Bell is like sleeping with your ex. I feel horrible afterwards and I'm...

All vendor demos are boring. It's the law, I think.

All vendor demos are boring. It's the law, I think.

The awful daring of a moment's surrender which an age of prudence can never retract.

The awful daring of a moment's surrender which an age of prudence can never retract.

For the past twenty years you and I have been fed all day long on...

For the past twenty years you and I have been fed all day long on...