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No, it was my fault for thinking that you might care

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No, it was my fault for thinking that you might care

Everyone I know is getting married or pregnant. I'm just getting more awesome

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Everyone I know is getting married or pregnant. I'm just getting more awesome

The only reason to wait a month for sex is if she's 17 years, 11...

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The only reason to wait a month for sex is if she's 17 years, 11...

There are only two reasons to date a girl you’ve already dated: breast implants.

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There are only two reasons to date a girl you’ve already dated: breast implants.

I can't do this anymore. I can't keep smiling and being optimistic all the time...

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I can't do this anymore. I can't keep smiling and being optimistic all the time...

All I want is to find a guy like Ted who'll love me like Marshall...

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All I want is to find a guy like Ted who'll love me like Marshall...

"How are you going to feel when he sees you without any makeup?" "I'm not...

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When you're down Friends say: "If you need me, give me a call". Best friends...

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When you're down Friends say:

There's three rules of cheating. It's not cheating if you're not the one who's married....

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There's three rules of cheating. It's not cheating if you're not the one who's married....

Come out of the closet and still be awesome CHALLENGE ACCEPTED

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Come out of the closet and still be awesome CHALLENGE ACCEPTED

Love the life you live. Live the life you love.

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Love the life you live. Live the life you love.

In my body, where the shame gland should be, there is a second awesome gland....

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In my body, where the shame gland should be, there is a second awesome gland....

Isn't it strange how you're constantly reminded to be nice to everyone and not to...

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Isn't it strange how you're constantly reminded to be nice to everyone and not to...

Confidence is a lot of this game or any game. If you don't think you...

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Confidence is a lot of this game or any game. If you don't think you...

Don't be ashamed of the way you look. You have exactly what somebody else wants.

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Don't be ashamed of the way you look. You have exactly what somebody else wants.

Happiness starts with you, not with your relationships, not with your job, not with your...

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Happiness starts with you, not with your relationships, not with your job, not with your...

All you need is confidence.

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All you need is confidence.

No one can make you feel inferior without your consent.

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No one can make you feel inferior without your consent.

Confidence is the sexiest thing a woman can have. It's much sexier than any body...

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Confidence is the sexiest thing a woman can have. It's much sexier than any body...

I dress the way I want. I don't pretend to be someone I'm not

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I dress the way I want. I don't pretend to be someone I'm not

I always think clothes make you look fat, so I prefer to be naked.

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I always think clothes make you look fat, so I prefer to be naked.