There is little chance that meteorologists can solve the mysteries of weather until they gain an understanding of the mutual attraction of rain and weekends.

Quote by Arnot Sheppard

Topics: Funny Quotes, Weekend Quotes

I've been in more laps than a napkin.

I've been in more laps than a napkin.

And in the end it's not the years in your life that count. It's the...

And in the end it's not the years in your life that count. It's the...

Ghosts, like ladies, never speak till spoke to.

Ghosts, like ladies, never speak till spoke to.

Big news on CNN, a search has uncovered illegal biochemical agents, toxins and other dangerous...

Big news on CNN, a search has uncovered illegal biochemical agents, toxins and other dangerous...

An archaeologist is the best husband a woman can have. The older she gets the...

An archaeologist is the best husband a woman can have. The older she gets the...

I always like to know everything about my new friends, and nothing about my old...

I always like to know everything about my new friends, and nothing about my old...

The Olympic Spirit is neither the property of one race nor of one age.

The Olympic Spirit is neither the property of one race nor of one age.

I always wait for the Times each morning. I look at the obituary column and...

I always wait for the Times each morning. I look at the obituary column and...

I refuse to endure months of expensive humiliation only to be told that at the...

I refuse to endure months of expensive humiliation only to be told that at the...

Whatever you may look like, marry a man your own age - as your beauty...

Whatever you may look like, marry a man your own age - as your beauty...

For three days after death, hair and fingernails continue to grow but phone calls taper...

For three days after death, hair and fingernails continue to grow but phone calls taper...

This suspense is terrible. I hope it will last.

This suspense is terrible. I hope it will last.

Everything is funny as long as it is happening to somebody else.

Everything is funny as long as it is happening to somebody else.

Men are liars. We lie about lying if we have to.

Men are liars. We lie about lying if we have to.

I will never be an old man. To me, old age is always 15 years...

I will never be an old man. To me, old age is always 15 years...

I shall call him squishy and he shall be mine and he shall be my...

I shall call him squishy and he shall be mine and he shall be my...

There cannot be a crisis next week. My schedule is already full.

There cannot be a crisis next week. My schedule is already full.

The answer to old age is to keep one's mind busy and to go on...

The answer to old age is to keep one's mind busy and to go on...

Weekends don't count unless you spend them doing something completely pointless.

Weekends don't count unless you spend them doing something completely pointless.

Spend some time this weekend on home improvement; improve your attitude toward your family.

Spend some time this weekend on home improvement; improve your attitude toward your family.