I refuse to endure months of expensive humiliation only to be told that at the age of four I was in love with my rocking horse.

Quote by Noel Coward

Topics: Age Quotes, Funny Quotes

I like long walks, especially when they are taken by people who annoy me.

I like long walks, especially when they are taken by people who annoy me.

Time has convinced me of one thing: Television is for appearing on - not for...

Time has convinced me of one thing: Television is for appearing on - not for...

I love criticism just so long as it's unqualified praise.

I love criticism just so long as it's unqualified praise.

We have no reliable guarantee that the afterlife will be any less exasperating than this...

We have no reliable guarantee that the afterlife will be any less exasperating than this...

I'll go through life either first class or third, but never in second.

I'll go through life either first class or third, but never in second.

I am not a heavy drinker. I can sometimes go for hours without touching a...

I am not a heavy drinker. I can sometimes go for hours without touching a...

People are wrong when they say opera is not what it used to be. It...

People are wrong when they say opera is not what it used to be. It...

Learn the lines and don't bump into the furniture.

Learn the lines and don't bump into the furniture.

The sun never sets on Government House.

The sun never sets on Government House.

I'm not a heavy drinker, I can sometimes go for hours without touching a drop.

I'm not a heavy drinker, I can sometimes go for hours without touching a drop.

Extraordinary how potent cheap music is.

Extraordinary how potent cheap music is.

Let's drink to the spirit of gallantry and courage that made a strange Heaven out...

Let's drink to the spirit of gallantry and courage that made a strange Heaven out...

My body has certainly wandered a good deal, but I have an uneasy suspicion that...

My body has certainly wandered a good deal, but I have an uneasy suspicion that...

I have a memory like an elephant. In fact, elephants often consult me.

I have a memory like an elephant. In fact, elephants often consult me.

Just say the lines and don't trip over the furniture.

Just say the lines and don't trip over the furniture.

I have always paid income tax. I object only when it reaches a stage when...

I have always paid income tax. I object only when it reaches a stage when...

That strange feeling we had in the war. Have you found anything in your lives...

That strange feeling we had in the war. Have you found anything in your lives...

Squash - that's not exercise, it's flagellation.

Squash - that's not exercise, it's flagellation.

I don't believe in astrology. The only stars I can blame for my failures are...

I don't believe in astrology. The only stars I can blame for my failures are...

People are wrong when they say opera is not what it used to be. It...

People are wrong when they say opera is not what it used to be. It...