You know what they should call this war - Son of Bush vs. Son of a Bitch.

Quote by Jay Leno

Topics: Jay Leno Quotes

You're not famous until my mother has heard of you.

You're not famous until my mother has heard of you.

President Clinton, this guy is sharp. Boy, he gave Hillary the most romantic Valentine's gift...

President Clinton, this guy is sharp. Boy, he gave Hillary the most romantic Valentine's gift...

The crime problem in New York is getting really serious. The other day the Statue...

The crime problem in New York is getting really serious. The other day the Statue...

I went into a McDonald's yesterday and said, I'd like some fries. The girl at...

I went into a McDonald's yesterday and said, I'd like some fries. The girl at...

Nineteen percent of doctors say that they'd be able to give their patients a lethal...

Nineteen percent of doctors say that they'd be able to give their patients a lethal...

Today is Valentine's Day - or, as men like to call it, Extortion Day!

Today is Valentine's Day - or, as men like to call it, Extortion Day!

Now see, a lot of critics are saying Arnold can't get elected because he's just...

Now see, a lot of critics are saying Arnold can't get elected because he's just...

The crime problem in New York is getting really serious. The other day the Statue...

The crime problem in New York is getting really serious. The other day the Statue...

The Bush administration said today there is a lot of support for us to attack...

The Bush administration said today there is a lot of support for us to attack...

My wife is going to kill me. But you look like my wife, so that's...

My wife is going to kill me. But you look like my wife, so that's...

The Supreme Court has ruled that they cannot have a nativity scene in Washington, D.C....

The Supreme Court has ruled that they cannot have a nativity scene in Washington, D.C....

Men are liars. We lie about lying if we have to.

Men are liars. We lie about lying if we have to.

Forty million Americans smoked marijuana; the only ones who didn't like it were Judge Ginsberg,...

Forty million Americans smoked marijuana; the only ones who didn't like it were Judge Ginsberg,...

Thanksgiving, when the Indians said, Well, this has been fun, but we know you have...

Thanksgiving, when the Indians said, Well, this has been fun, but we know you have...

Bush said today he is being stalked. He said wherever he goes, people are following...

Bush said today he is being stalked. He said wherever he goes, people are following...

President Bush said this Iraq situation looks like 'the rerun of a bad movie.' Well...

President Bush said this Iraq situation looks like 'the rerun of a bad movie.' Well...

New Year's Eve, where auld acquaintance be forgot. Unless, of course, those tests come back...

New Year's Eve, where auld acquaintance be forgot. Unless, of course, those tests come back...

Politics is just show business for ugly people

Politics is just show business for ugly people

Good news. President Bush is creating thousands of new jobs. Unfortunately, all of them are...

Good news. President Bush is creating thousands of new jobs. Unfortunately, all of them are...

The job of the poet is to render the world - to see it and...

The job of the poet is to render the world - to see it and...

The landlady of a boarding-house is a parallelogram - that is, an oblong angular figure,...

The landlady of a boarding-house is a parallelogram - that is, an oblong angular figure,...

The Liberals are the flying saucers of politics. No one can make head nor tail...

The Liberals are the flying saucers of politics. No one can make head nor tail...