They've got great parents; I'm just trying to be the fun uncle.

Quote by Sarah Silverman

Topics: Sarah Silverman Quotes

I was going to get an abortion the other day. I totally wanted an abortion....

I was going to get an abortion the other day. I totally wanted an abortion....

I don't set out to offend or shock, but I also don't do anything to...

I don't set out to offend or shock, but I also don't do anything to...

By the time I would have graduated, at 22, I was a writer and featured...

By the time I would have graduated, at 22, I was a writer and featured...

I'm Jewish, but I'm totally not.

I'm Jewish, but I'm totally not.

I looked up and saw the shape of a heart made by the silhouette of...

I looked up and saw the shape of a heart made by the silhouette of...

You know, I think whatever a comic talks about onstage is all they talk about...

You know, I think whatever a comic talks about onstage is all they talk about...

SS: Jesus is Magic.

SS: Jesus is Magic.

Relations between black and white would be greatly improved if we were more accepting of...

Relations between black and white would be greatly improved if we were more accepting of...

And then before going back for my sophomore year, I decided to change my major...

And then before going back for my sophomore year, I decided to change my major...

I'll tell you why we make fun of midgets: We're not afraid of them.

I'll tell you why we make fun of midgets: We're not afraid of them.

I have a ton of Holocaust stuff, and some of it is really hard core.

I have a ton of Holocaust stuff, and some of it is really hard core.

You have to be able to laugh at yourself. That's what I tell Asian people...

You have to be able to laugh at yourself. That's what I tell Asian people...

This is crazy Donald. When I see the prices at the mall, I just want...

This is crazy Donald. When I see the prices at the mall, I just want...

I say 'I'm sorry.' It usually disarms them.

I say 'I'm sorry.' It usually disarms them.

The first time I did stand-up was the summer I was 17.

The first time I did stand-up was the summer I was 17.

But I think you can make fun of anything as long as it's funny enough.

But I think you can make fun of anything as long as it's funny enough.

I really think everything is fair game.

I really think everything is fair game.

Well, I'm not afraid to say something if I think it's funny, even if it's...

Well, I'm not afraid to say something if I think it's funny, even if it's...

That's not to say that I don't find anything offensive.

That's not to say that I don't find anything offensive.

It shows the truth - that the real meaning of a word is only as...

It shows the truth - that the real meaning of a word is only as...