Someday I want to be rich. Some people get so rich they lose all respect for humanity. That's how rich I want to be.

Quote by Rita Rudner

Topics: Dating Quotes

Marriages don't last. When I meet a guy, the first question I ask myself is:...

Marriages don't last. When I meet a guy, the first question I ask myself is:...

I don't think jogging is healthy, especially morning jogging. If morning joggers knew how tempting...

I don't think jogging is healthy, especially morning jogging. If morning joggers knew how tempting...

It's so great to find that one special person You want to annoy for the...

It's so great to find that one special person You want to annoy for the...

Men forget everything; women remember everything. That's why men need instant replays in sports. They've...

Men forget everything; women remember everything. That's why men need instant replays in sports. They've...

Men reach their sexual peak at eighteen. Women reach theirs at thirty-five. Do you get...

Men reach their sexual peak at eighteen. Women reach theirs at thirty-five. Do you get...

A man will go to war, fight and die for his country. But he won't...

A man will go to war, fight and die for his country. But he won't...

I know I want to have children while my parents are still young enough to...

I know I want to have children while my parents are still young enough to...

I wonder if other dogs think poodles are members of a weird religious cult.

I wonder if other dogs think poodles are members of a weird religious cult.

Some people get so rich they lose all respect for humanity. That's how rich I...

Some people get so rich they lose all respect for humanity. That's how rich I...

Whenever I date a guy, I think, 'Is this the man I want my children...

Whenever I date a guy, I think, 'Is this the man I want my children...

My mother is such a lousy cook that Thanksgiving at her house is a time...

My mother is such a lousy cook that Thanksgiving at her house is a time...

I don't plan to grow old gracefully. I plan to have face-lifts until my ears...

I don't plan to grow old gracefully. I plan to have face-lifts until my ears...

Some women hold up dresses that are so ugly and they always say the same...

Some women hold up dresses that are so ugly and they always say the same...

When I eventually met Mr. Right I had no idea that his first name was...

When I eventually met Mr. Right I had no idea that his first name was...

They usually have two tellers in my local bank, except when it's very busy, when...

They usually have two tellers in my local bank, except when it's very busy, when...

Life is tough enough without having someone kick you from the inside.

Life is tough enough without having someone kick you from the inside.

In Hollywood a marriage is a success if it outlasts milk.

In Hollywood a marriage is a success if it outlasts milk.

On the 12th day of Christmas, my Facebook gave too me, 12 stupid bitches, 11...

On the 12th day of Christmas, my Facebook gave too me, 12 stupid bitches, 11...

Sometimes I'm so sweet even I can't stand it.

Sometimes I'm so sweet even I can't stand it.

What are the three words guaranteed to humiliate men everywhere? 'Hold my purse'.

What are the three words guaranteed to humiliate men everywhere? 'Hold my purse'.