My boyfriend's name is sleep and I get some every night.
There are three reasons for breast-feeding: the milk is always at the right temperature; it...
A male gynecologist is like an auto mechanic who has never owned a car
Politicians are wonderful people as long as they stay away from things they don't understand,...
At your age The hey-day in the blood is tame, it's humble.
Ours is the age of substitutes: instead of language, we have jargon: instead of principles,...
I love to go to Washington - if only to be near my money.
Santa Claus has the right idea. Visit people once a year.
My father was a simple man. My mother was a simple woman. You see the...
I said to the wife, Guess what I heard in the pub? They reckon the...
Marriage is a three ring circus: engagement ring, wedding ring, and suffering.
I love running cross country....On a track, I feel like a hamster.
Sisters never quite forgive each other for what happened when they were five.
A man's face is his autobiography. A woman's face is her work of fiction.
Experience is a revelation in the light of which we renounce our errors of youth...
At 38 years, I finally got me the woman that said those six words I...
Not only is there no God, but try getting a plumber on weekends.
Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity; and Im not sure about the...
The arrogance of age must submit to be taught by youth.
That amazing feeling that you get when you hug a guy and he's so much...
The difference between me and her? I can make him smile with my pants on.
Everyone should have kids. They are the greatest joy in the world. But they are...