Love is so confusing - you tell a girl she looks great and what's the first thing you do? Turn out the lights!

Quote by Robert Orben

Topics: Love Quotes

I take my children everywhere, but they always find their way back home.

I take my children everywhere, but they always find their way back home.

Never raise your hand to your children - it leaves your midsection unprotected.

Never raise your hand to your children - it leaves your midsection unprotected.

Older people shouldn't eat health food, they need all the preservatives they can get.

Older people shouldn't eat health food, they need all the preservatives they can get.

Illegal aliens have always been a problem in the United States. Ask any Indian.

Illegal aliens have always been a problem in the United States. Ask any Indian.

I got a Valentine's Day card from my girl. It said, 'Take my heart! Take...

I got a Valentine's Day card from my girl. It said, 'Take my heart! Take...

There are days when it takes all you've got just to keep up with the...

There are days when it takes all you've got just to keep up with the...

A vacation is having nothing to do and all day to do it in.

A vacation is having nothing to do and all day to do it in.

Happiness is a very small desk and a very big wastebasket.

Happiness is a very small desk and a very big wastebasket.

In prehistoric times, mankind often had only two choices in crisis situations: fight or flee....

In prehistoric times, mankind often had only two choices in crisis situations: fight or flee....

Most people would like to be delivered from temptation but would like it to keep...

Most people would like to be delivered from temptation but would like it to keep...

Washington is a place where politicians don't know which way is up and taxes don't...

Washington is a place where politicians don't know which way is up and taxes don't...

Planned obsolescence is not really a new concept. God used it with people.

Planned obsolescence is not really a new concept. God used it with people.

Illegal aliens have always been a problem in the United States. Ask any Indian.

Illegal aliens have always been a problem in the United States. Ask any Indian.

I always wondered why babies spend so much time sucking their thumbs. Then I tasted...

I always wondered why babies spend so much time sucking their thumbs. Then I tasted...

Love is so confusing - you tell a girl she looks great and what's the...

Love is so confusing - you tell a girl she looks great and what's the...

If you can laugh together, you can work together

If you can laugh together, you can work together

Every day I get up and look through the Forbes list of the richest people...

Every day I get up and look through the Forbes list of the richest people...

Washington is a place where politicians don't know which way is up and taxes don't...

Washington is a place where politicians don't know which way is up and taxes don't...

World War II was the last government program that really worked.

World War II was the last government program that really worked.

Dullness in matters of government is a good sign, and not a bad one -...

Dullness in matters of government is a good sign, and not a bad one -...