Lots of people who complained about us receiving the MBE received theirs for heroism in the war - for killing people. We received ours for entertaining other people. I'd say we deserve ours more.

Quote by Joseph Heller

Topics: Joseph Heller Quotes

He was a self-made man who owed his lack of success to nobody.

He was a self-made man who owed his lack of success to nobody.

Peace on earth would mean the end of civilization as we know it.

Peace on earth would mean the end of civilization as we know it.

Every writer I know has trouble writing.

Every writer I know has trouble writing.

Some people are born mediocre, some people achieve mediocrity, and some people have mediocrity thrust...

Some people are born mediocre, some people achieve mediocrity, and some people have mediocrity thrust...

I want to keep my dreams, even bad ones, because without them, I might have...

I want to keep my dreams, even bad ones, because without them, I might have...

Some men are born mediocre, some men achieve mediocrity, and some men have mediocrity thrust...

Some men are born mediocre, some men achieve mediocrity, and some men have mediocrity thrust...

He knew everything about literature except how to enjoy it.

He knew everything about literature except how to enjoy it.

I don't believe in miracles because it's been a long time since we've had any.

I don't believe in miracles because it's been a long time since we've had any.

Destiny is a good thing to accept when it's going your way. When it isn't,...

Destiny is a good thing to accept when it's going your way. When it isn't,...

He had decided to live forever or die in the attempt.

He had decided to live forever or die in the attempt.

When I read something saying I've not done anything as good as Catch-22 I'm tempted...

When I read something saying I've not done anything as good as Catch-22 I'm tempted...

Every writer I know has trouble writing.

Every writer I know has trouble writing.

There was only one catch and that was Catch-22. Orr would be crazy to fly...

There was only one catch and that was Catch-22. Orr would be crazy to fly...

He knew everything about literature except how to enjoy it.

He knew everything about literature except how to enjoy it.

But that was war. Just about all he could find in its favor was that...

But that was war. Just about all he could find in its favor was that...

Success and failure are both difficult to endure. Along with success come drugs, divorce, fornication,...

Success and failure are both difficult to endure. Along with success come drugs, divorce, fornication,...

I had examined myself pretty thoroughly and discovered that I was unfit for military service.

I had examined myself pretty thoroughly and discovered that I was unfit for military service.

Hungry Joe collected lists of fatal diseases and arranged them in alphabetical order so that...

Hungry Joe collected lists of fatal diseases and arranged them in alphabetical order so that...

I'd like to see the government get out of war altogether and leave the whole...

I'd like to see the government get out of war altogether and leave the whole...

Rise above principle and do what's right.

Rise above principle and do what's right.