If God had wanted us to vote, he would have given us candidates.

Quote by Jay Leno

Topics: Jay Leno Quotes

Now see, a lot of critics are saying Arnold can't get elected because he's just...

Now see, a lot of critics are saying Arnold can't get elected because he's just...

Magic Johnson, former basketball player, may run for mayor of LA in the next election....

Magic Johnson, former basketball player, may run for mayor of LA in the next election....

Bush reiterated his stand to conservatives opposing his decision on stem cell research. He said...

Bush reiterated his stand to conservatives opposing his decision on stem cell research. He said...

The reason there are two senators for each state is so that one can be...

The reason there are two senators for each state is so that one can be...

Don't forget Mother's Day. Or as they call it in Beverly Hills, Dad's Third Wife...

Don't forget Mother's Day. Or as they call it in Beverly Hills, Dad's Third Wife...

My wife is going to kill me. But you look like my wife, so that's...

My wife is going to kill me. But you look like my wife, so that's...

Men are liars. We lie about lying if we have to.

Men are liars. We lie about lying if we have to.

For the first time ever, overweight people outnumber average people in America. Doesn't that make...

For the first time ever, overweight people outnumber average people in America. Doesn't that make...

Bush said today he is being stalked. He said wherever he goes, people are following...

Bush said today he is being stalked. He said wherever he goes, people are following...

Today is Valentine's Day - or, as men like to call it, Extortion Day!

Today is Valentine's Day - or, as men like to call it, Extortion Day!

NBC - no body cares.

NBC - no body cares.

Politics is just show business for ugly people

Politics is just show business for ugly people

Don't forget Mother's Day. Or as they call it in Beverly Hills, Dad's Third Wife...

Don't forget Mother's Day. Or as they call it in Beverly Hills, Dad's Third Wife...

Al Gore has found a new job. He is going to teach journalism at Columbia...

Al Gore has found a new job. He is going to teach journalism at Columbia...

Magic Johnson, former basketball player, may run for mayor of LA in the next election....

Magic Johnson, former basketball player, may run for mayor of LA in the next election....

CNN found that Hillary Clinton is the most admired woman in America. Women admire her...

CNN found that Hillary Clinton is the most admired woman in America. Women admire her...

Scientists are complaining that the new Dinosaur movie shows dinosaurs with lemurs, who didn't evolve...

Scientists are complaining that the new Dinosaur movie shows dinosaurs with lemurs, who didn't evolve...

The Washington Bullets are changing their name. They don't want their team to be associated...

The Washington Bullets are changing their name. They don't want their team to be associated...

I went into a McDonald's yesterday and said, I'd like some fries. The girl at...

I went into a McDonald's yesterday and said, I'd like some fries. The girl at...

The crime problem in New York is getting really serious. The other day the Statue...

The crime problem in New York is getting really serious. The other day the Statue...