If God had wanted us to be concerned for the plight of the toads, he would have made them cute and furry.

Quote by Dave Barry

Topics: Dave Barry Quotes

People who want to share their religious views with you almost never want you to...

People who want to share their religious views with you almost never want you to...

In 1765, Parliament passed the Stamp Act, which, as any American high school student can...

In 1765, Parliament passed the Stamp Act, which, as any American high school student can...

Another possible source of guidance for teenagers is television, but television's message has always been...

Another possible source of guidance for teenagers is television, but television's message has always been...

One day soon the Gillette company will announce the development of a razor that, thanks...

One day soon the Gillette company will announce the development of a razor that, thanks...

Electricity is actually made up of extremely tiny particles called electrons that you cannot see...

Electricity is actually made up of extremely tiny particles called electrons that you cannot see...

All of us are born with a set of instinctive fears - of falling, of...

All of us are born with a set of instinctive fears - of falling, of...

I would not know how I am supposed to feel about many stories if not...

I would not know how I am supposed to feel about many stories if not...

Dogs feel very strongly that they should always go with you in the car, in...

Dogs feel very strongly that they should always go with you in the car, in...

To an adolescent, there is nothing in the world more embarrassing than a parent.

To an adolescent, there is nothing in the world more embarrassing than a parent.

Never under any circumstances take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night.

Never under any circumstances take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night.

Scientists now believe that the primary biological function of breasts is to make males stupid.

Scientists now believe that the primary biological function of breasts is to make males stupid.

I now realize that the small hills you see on ski slopes are formed around...

I now realize that the small hills you see on ski slopes are formed around...

And so by the fifteenth century, on October 8, the Europeans were looking for a...

And so by the fifteenth century, on October 8, the Europeans were looking for a...

Violence and smut are of course everywhere on the airwaves. You cannot turn on your...

Violence and smut are of course everywhere on the airwaves. You cannot turn on your...

The ultimate camping trip was the Lewis and Clark expedition.

The ultimate camping trip was the Lewis and Clark expedition.

The simple truth is that balding African-American men look cool when they shave their heads,...

The simple truth is that balding African-American men look cool when they shave their heads,...

A program is a spell cast over a computer, turning input into error messages

A program is a spell cast over a computer, turning input into error messages

The problem with winter sports is that, follow me closely here, they generally take place...

The problem with winter sports is that, follow me closely here, they generally take place...

My wife is going to kill me. But you look like my wife, so that's...

My wife is going to kill me. But you look like my wife, so that's...

A good and true woman is said to resemble a Cremona fiddle: age but increases...

A good and true woman is said to resemble a Cremona fiddle: age but increases...

Of winters lifeless world each tree. Now seems a perfect part; Yet each one holds...

Of winters lifeless world each tree. Now seems a perfect part; Yet each one holds...