I was always taught to respect my elders and I've now reached the age when I don't have anybody to respect.

Quote by George F Burns

Topics: Age Quotes

This is the sixth book I've written, which isn't bad for a guy who's only...

This is the sixth book I've written, which isn't bad for a guy who's only...

I smoke ten to fifteen cigars a day. At my age I have to hold...

I smoke ten to fifteen cigars a day. At my age I have to hold...

I can remember when the air was clean and sex was dirty

I can remember when the air was clean and sex was dirty

Don't stay in bed, unless you can make money in bed.

Don't stay in bed, unless you can make money in bed.

It takes only one drink to get me drunk. The trouble is, I can't remember...

It takes only one drink to get me drunk. The trouble is, I can't remember...

Retirement at sixty-five is ridiculous. When I was sixty-five I still had pimples.

Retirement at sixty-five is ridiculous. When I was sixty-five I still had pimples.

Sex at age 90 is like trying to shoot pool with a rope.

Sex at age 90 is like trying to shoot pool with a rope.

I smoke ten to fifteen cigars a day. At my age I have to hold...

I smoke ten to fifteen cigars a day. At my age I have to hold...

The secret of a good sermon is to have a good beginning and a good...

The secret of a good sermon is to have a good beginning and a good...

People are always asking me when Im going to retire. Why should I? Ive got...

People are always asking me when Im going to retire. Why should I? Ive got...

Retire? I'm going to stay in show business until I'm the only one left

Retire? I'm going to stay in show business until I'm the only one left

At my age flowers scare me.

At my age flowers scare me.

It's hard for me to get used to these changing times. I can remember when...

It's hard for me to get used to these changing times. I can remember when...

Define your business goals clearly so that others can see them as you do.

Define your business goals clearly so that others can see them as you do.

It takes only one drink to get me drunk. The trouble is, I can't remember...

It takes only one drink to get me drunk. The trouble is, I can't remember...

Don't stay in bed, unless you can make money in bed.

Don't stay in bed, unless you can make money in bed.

I'd rather be a failure at something I enjoy than a success at something I...

I'd rather be a failure at something I enjoy than a success at something I...

Keep on beginning and failing. Each time you fail, start all over again, and you...

Keep on beginning and failing. Each time you fail, start all over again, and you...

Failure is simply a few errors in judgment, repeated every day.

Failure is simply a few errors in judgment, repeated every day.

Everyone excels in something in which another fails.

Everyone excels in something in which another fails.