I want to have children, but my friends scare me. One of my friends told me she was in labor for 36 hours. I don't even want to do anything that feels good for 36 hours.

Quote by Rita Rudner

Topics: Friends Quotes

Marriages don't last. When I meet a guy, the first question I ask myself is:...

Marriages don't last. When I meet a guy, the first question I ask myself is:...

Love being married. It's so great to find that one special person you want to...

Love being married. It's so great to find that one special person you want to...

I wonder if other dogs think poodles are members of a weird religious cult.

I wonder if other dogs think poodles are members of a weird religious cult.

I don't think jogging is healthy, especially morning jogging. If morning joggers knew how tempting...

I don't think jogging is healthy, especially morning jogging. If morning joggers knew how tempting...

Men who have a pierced ear are better prepared for marriage - they've experienced pain...

Men who have a pierced ear are better prepared for marriage - they've experienced pain...

It's so great to find that one special person you want to annoy for the...

It's so great to find that one special person you want to annoy for the...

When I eventually met Mr. Right I had no idea that his first name was...

When I eventually met Mr. Right I had no idea that his first name was...

Most turkeys taste better the day after, my mother's tasted better the day before

Most turkeys taste better the day after, my mother's tasted better the day before

Whenever I date a guy, I think, 'Is this the man I want my children...

Whenever I date a guy, I think, 'Is this the man I want my children...

In Hollywood a marriage is a success if it outlasts milk.

In Hollywood a marriage is a success if it outlasts milk.

I think men who have a pierced ear are better prepared for marriage. They've experienced...

I think men who have a pierced ear are better prepared for marriage. They've experienced...

I know I want to have children while my parents are still young enough to...

I know I want to have children while my parents are still young enough to...

The time you spend grieving over a man should never exceed the amount of time...

The time you spend grieving over a man should never exceed the amount of time...

My mother is such a lousy cook that Thanksgiving at her house is a time...

My mother is such a lousy cook that Thanksgiving at her house is a time...

The word 'aerobics' came about when the gym instructors got together and said: If we're...

The word 'aerobics' came about when the gym instructors got together and said: If we're...

Some women hold up dresses that are so ugly and they always say the same...

Some women hold up dresses that are so ugly and they always say the same...

Men reach their sexual peak at eighteen. Women reach theirs at thirty-five. Do you get...

Men reach their sexual peak at eighteen. Women reach theirs at thirty-five. Do you get...

Perhaps what I do not manage to operate rapidly enough is the passage between the...

Perhaps what I do not manage to operate rapidly enough is the passage between the...

So you're the little woman who wrote the book that made this great war.

So you're the little woman who wrote the book that made this great war.

I chased a girl for two years only to discover that her tastes were exactly...

I chased a girl for two years only to discover that her tastes were exactly...