I want to have children, but my friends scare me. One of my friends told me she was in labor for 36 hours. I don't even want to do anything that feels good for 36 hours.

Quote by Rita Rudner

Topics: Friends Quotes

It wasn't that no one asked me to the prom, it was that no one...

It wasn't that no one asked me to the prom, it was that no one...

Men who have a pierced ear are better prepared for marriage - they've experienced pain...

Men who have a pierced ear are better prepared for marriage - they've experienced pain...

My husband and I are either going to buy a dog or have a child....

My husband and I are either going to buy a dog or have a child....

Men who consistently leave the toilet seat up secretly want women to get up to...

Men who consistently leave the toilet seat up secretly want women to get up to...

Some people think having large breasts makes a woman stupid. Actually, it's quite the opposite:...

Some people think having large breasts makes a woman stupid. Actually, it's quite the opposite:...

Some women hold up dresses that are so ugly and they always say the same...

Some women hold up dresses that are so ugly and they always say the same...

The time you spend grieving over a man should never exceed the amount of time...

The time you spend grieving over a man should never exceed the amount of time...

My mother buried three husbands - and two of them were only napping.

My mother buried three husbands - and two of them were only napping.

I love being married. It's so great to find that one special person you want...

I love being married. It's so great to find that one special person you want...

I think men who have a pierced ear are better prepared for marriage. They've experienced...

I think men who have a pierced ear are better prepared for marriage. They've experienced...

Life is tough enough without having someone kick you from the inside.

Life is tough enough without having someone kick you from the inside.

The older theory was, marry an older man because they're more mature. But the new...

The older theory was, marry an older man because they're more mature. But the new...

Love being married. It's so great to find that one special person you want to...

Love being married. It's so great to find that one special person you want to...

To attract men, I wear a perfume called New Car Interior.

To attract men, I wear a perfume called New Car Interior.

I got kicked out of ballet class because I pulled a groin muscle. It wasn't...

I got kicked out of ballet class because I pulled a groin muscle. It wasn't...

Most turkeys taste better the day after, my mother's tasted better the day before

Most turkeys taste better the day after, my mother's tasted better the day before

I don't think jogging is healthy, especially morning jogging. If morning joggers knew how tempting...

I don't think jogging is healthy, especially morning jogging. If morning joggers knew how tempting...

My boyfriend and I broke up. He wanted to get married and I didn't want...

My boyfriend and I broke up. He wanted to get married and I didn't want...

I've given my memoirs far more thought than any of my marriages. You can't divorce...

I've given my memoirs far more thought than any of my marriages. You can't divorce...

I want my time to be taken up by chores, errands, appointments, and arguments. In...

I want my time to be taken up by chores, errands, appointments, and arguments. In...

You want me to act like we've never kissed, you want to forget; pretend we've...

You want me to act like we've never kissed, you want to forget; pretend we've...