Someday I want to be rich. Some people get so rich they lose all respect for humanity. That's how rich I want to be.

Quote by Rita Rudner

Topics: America And Americans Quotes, Family Quotes, Sorrow Quotes

I know I want to have children while my parents are still young enough to...

I know I want to have children while my parents are still young enough to...

In Hollywood a marriage is a success if it outlasts milk.

In Hollywood a marriage is a success if it outlasts milk.

Men who have a pierced ear are better prepared for marriage - they've experienced pain...

Men who have a pierced ear are better prepared for marriage - they've experienced pain...

My mother buried three husbands - and two of them were only napping.

My mother buried three husbands - and two of them were only napping.

The time you spend grieving over a man should never exceed the amount of time...

The time you spend grieving over a man should never exceed the amount of time...

It's so great to find that one special person You want to annoy for the...

It's so great to find that one special person You want to annoy for the...

Before I met my husband, I'd never fallen in love. I'd stepped in it a...

Before I met my husband, I'd never fallen in love. I'd stepped in it a...

My mother is such a lousy cook that Thanksgiving at her house is a time...

My mother is such a lousy cook that Thanksgiving at her house is a time...

Beer is good food

Beer is good food

Marriages don't last. When I meet a guy, the first question I ask myself is:...

Marriages don't last. When I meet a guy, the first question I ask myself is:...

I don't plan to grow old gracefully. I plan to have face-lifts until my ears...

I don't plan to grow old gracefully. I plan to have face-lifts until my ears...

I was a vegetarian until I started leaning toward the sunlight.

I was a vegetarian until I started leaning toward the sunlight.

I wonder if other dogs think poodles are members of a weird religious cult.

I wonder if other dogs think poodles are members of a weird religious cult.

They usually have two tellers in my local bank, except when it's very busy, when...

They usually have two tellers in my local bank, except when it's very busy, when...

My husband gave me a necklace. It's fake. I requested fake. Maybe I'm paranoid, but...

My husband gave me a necklace. It's fake. I requested fake. Maybe I'm paranoid, but...

Most turkeys taste better the day after, my mother's tasted better the day before

Most turkeys taste better the day after, my mother's tasted better the day before

I don't think jogging is healthy, especially morning jogging. If morning joggers knew how tempting...

I don't think jogging is healthy, especially morning jogging. If morning joggers knew how tempting...

There are three rules for writing a novel. Unfortunately, no one knows what they are.

There are three rules for writing a novel. Unfortunately, no one knows what they are.

Opportunity dances with those who are already on the dance floor.

Opportunity dances with those who are already on the dance floor.

If there were no schools to take the children away from home part of the...

If there were no schools to take the children away from home part of the...

Running helps me stay on an even keel and in an optimistic frame of mind.

Running helps me stay on an even keel and in an optimistic frame of mind.