I have been in a lot of movies, but none of them are critics' darlings, you might say.

Quote by Artie Lange

Topics: Artie Lange Quotes

Have you ever Googled yourself? I did, most depressing thing ever. People have websites hoping...

Have you ever Googled yourself? I did, most depressing thing ever. People have websites hoping...

When I black out, it's the happiest time of my life.

When I black out, it's the happiest time of my life.

Everytime I go to Vegas, I seem to incur some kind of fine.

Everytime I go to Vegas, I seem to incur some kind of fine.

Whiskey will always be a part of my life.

Whiskey will always be a part of my life.

By the time I am Howard's age I hope to be long retired. I don't...

By the time I am Howard's age I hope to be long retired. I don't...

Artie is going to do what ever Artie wants to do.

Artie is going to do what ever Artie wants to do.

Vegas means comedy, tragedy, happiness and sadness all at the same time.

Vegas means comedy, tragedy, happiness and sadness all at the same time.

The point of drinking in moderation is that sometimes you don't drink in moderation.

The point of drinking in moderation is that sometimes you don't drink in moderation.

A weekend in Vegas without gambling and drinking is just like being a born-again Christian.

A weekend in Vegas without gambling and drinking is just like being a born-again Christian.

I was at Yankee Stadium one time at 5 a.m., but that was to buy...

I was at Yankee Stadium one time at 5 a.m., but that was to buy...

The regular guy still relates to him and Howard is a $500 million guy now...

The regular guy still relates to him and Howard is a $500 million guy now...

When I got on Stern I realized that this was the one job where you...

When I got on Stern I realized that this was the one job where you...

Of course in show business there are two ways to play it and I am...

Of course in show business there are two ways to play it and I am...

I'm not going to lie to you fellas, I've been drinking.

I'm not going to lie to you fellas, I've been drinking.

I am not the easiest guy to live with. It is probably the lack of...

I am not the easiest guy to live with. It is probably the lack of...

And now it looks like I'm probably going to shoot a movie that I wrote....

And now it looks like I'm probably going to shoot a movie that I wrote....

It is funny because the guy who is my boss now, Howard Stern, has a...

It is funny because the guy who is my boss now, Howard Stern, has a...