Home, nowadays, is a place where part of the family waits till the rest of the family brings the car back.

Quote by Earl Wilson

Topics: Earl Wilson Quotes

Gossip, n.: Hearing something you like about someone you don't.

Gossip, n.: Hearing something you like about someone you don't.

Science may never come up with a better office communication system than the coffee break.

Science may never come up with a better office communication system than the coffee break.

A vacation is what you take when you can no longer take what you've been...

A vacation is what you take when you can no longer take what you've been...

This would be a much better world if more married couples were as deeply in...

This would be a much better world if more married couples were as deeply in...

Snow and adolescence are the only problems that disappear if you ignore them long enough.

Snow and adolescence are the only problems that disappear if you ignore them long enough.

A baseball game is simply a nervous breakdown divided into nine innings.

A baseball game is simply a nervous breakdown divided into nine innings.

Middle Age - Later than you think and sooner than you expect.

Middle Age - Later than you think and sooner than you expect.

Nothing is as embarrassing as watching your boss do something you assured him couldn't be...

Nothing is as embarrassing as watching your boss do something you assured him couldn't be...

Announcement from the proud parents of a baby daughter. We have skirted the issue.

Announcement from the proud parents of a baby daughter. We have skirted the issue.

No horse can go as fast as the money you put on it

No horse can go as fast as the money you put on it

Benjamin Franklin may have discovered electricity, but it was the man who invented the meter...

Benjamin Franklin may have discovered electricity, but it was the man who invented the meter...

The fastest way for a politician to become an elder statesman is to lose an...

The fastest way for a politician to become an elder statesman is to lose an...

A baseball game is simply a nervous breakdown divided into nine innings.

A baseball game is simply a nervous breakdown divided into nine innings.

If you think nobody cares if you're alive, try missing a couple of car payments.

If you think nobody cares if you're alive, try missing a couple of car payments.

For the parents of a Little Leaguer, a baseball game is simply a nervous breakdown...

For the parents of a Little Leaguer, a baseball game is simply a nervous breakdown...

He was so honest you could play craps with him over the phone.

He was so honest you could play craps with him over the phone.

To sell something, tell a woman it's a bargain; tell a man it's deductible.

To sell something, tell a woman it's a bargain; tell a man it's deductible.

The man who didn't want his wife to work has been succeeded by the man...

The man who didn't want his wife to work has been succeeded by the man...

Gossip is when you hear something you like about someone you don't.

Gossip is when you hear something you like about someone you don't.

Experience is what enables you to recognize a mistake when you make it again.

Experience is what enables you to recognize a mistake when you make it again.