Ever wonder if illiterate people get the full effect of alphabetsoup?

Quote by John Mendoza

Topics: Funny Quotes, People Quotes

You know you're getting fat when you can pinch an inch on your forehead.

You know you're getting fat when you can pinch an inch on your forehead.

Professional golf is the only sport where, if you win 20% of the time, youre...

Professional golf is the only sport where, if you win 20% of the time, youre...

I looked up my family tree and found out I was the sap.

I looked up my family tree and found out I was the sap.

What some people mistake for the high cost of living is really the cost of...

What some people mistake for the high cost of living is really the cost of...

The way taxes are, you might as well marry for love.

The way taxes are, you might as well marry for love.

I wonder why you can always read a doctor's bill and you can never read...

I wonder why you can always read a doctor's bill and you can never read...

The chalk thing lebron does before games...isn't chalk. It's dust from his fingers being ringless.

The chalk thing lebron does before games...isn't chalk. It's dust from his fingers being ringless.

What could be more beautiful than a dear old lady growing wise with age? Every...

What could be more beautiful than a dear old lady growing wise with age? Every...

Halloween is huge in my house and we really get into the spirits of things.

Halloween is huge in my house and we really get into the spirits of things.

Funny thing how you first meet the woman that you marry. I first met the...

Funny thing how you first meet the woman that you marry. I first met the...

Children also have artistic ability, and there is wisdom in there having it! The more...

Children also have artistic ability, and there is wisdom in there having it! The more...

Women are not forgiven for aging. Robert Redford's lines of distinction are my old-age wrinkles.

Women are not forgiven for aging. Robert Redford's lines of distinction are my old-age wrinkles.

A man's got to do what a man's got to do. A woman must do...

A man's got to do what a man's got to do. A woman must do...

Most of the time when people laugh at me...I'm not trying to be funny.

Most of the time when people laugh at me...I'm not trying to be funny.

Why is Monday so far from Friday but Friday so close to Monday?

Why is Monday so far from Friday but Friday so close to Monday?

I don't mind what language an opera is sung in so long as it is...

I don't mind what language an opera is sung in so long as it is...

If life were fair, Dan Quayle would be making a living asking 'Do you want...

If life were fair, Dan Quayle would be making a living asking 'Do you want...

My inner child is not wounded.

My inner child is not wounded.

We don't stop playing because we grow old; We grow old because we stop playing.

We don't stop playing because we grow old; We grow old because we stop playing.

People Change. Love Hurts. Everything Changed. But remember that life goes on...

People Change. Love Hurts. Everything Changed. But remember that life goes on...