ALLIANCE, n. In international politics, the union of two thieves who have their hands so deeply inserted in each other's pockets that they cannot separately plunder a third.
Quote by Ambrose Bierce
Optimism: The doctrine that everything is beautiful, including what is ugly, everything good, especially the...
Pray, v.: To ask that the laws of the universe be annulled on behalf of...
Erudition - dust shaken out of a book into an empty skull.
Bore, n. A person who talks when you wish him to listen.
Politeness is the most acceptable hypocrisy
Infidel: In New York, one who does not believe in the Christian religion; in Constantinople,...
Wit - the salt with which the American humorist spoils his intellectual cookery by leaving...
CIRCUS, n. A place where horses, ponies and elephants are permitted to see men, women...
Quotation, n: The act of repeating erroneously the words of another.
Irreligion - the principal one of the great faiths of the world.
You are not permitted to kill a woman who has injured you, but nothing forbids...
Absurdity, n.: A statement or belief manifestly inconsistent with one's own opinion.
Incompatibility. In matrimony a similarity of tastes, particularly the taste for domination.
Architect. One who drafts a plan of your house, and plans a draft of your...
The spiritual attitude of a man to a god and a dog to a man.
BRANDY, n. A cordial composed of one part thunder-and-lightning, one part remorse, two parts bloody...
Amnesty, n. The state's magnanimity to those offenders whom it would be too expensive to...
Jealous, adj. Unduly concerned about the preservation of that which can be lost only if...
A man is known by the company he organizes.
Life - a spiritual pickle preserving the body from decay.