A guy at work went in for a competition and won a trip to China. He's out there now...trying to win a trip back!

Quote by Jerry Dennis

Topics: Funny Quotes, Jokes Quotes

Sister to sister we will always be, a couple of nuts off the family tree.

Sister to sister we will always be, a couple of nuts off the family tree.

Who are you going to believe, me or your own eyes?

Who are you going to believe, me or your own eyes?

I do not know who first invented the myth of sexual equality. But it is...

I do not know who first invented the myth of sexual equality. But it is...

No one likes change but babies in diapers.

No one likes change but babies in diapers.

I'd love to kiss you, but I just washed my hair.

I'd love to kiss you, but I just washed my hair.

Fatherhood is pretending the present you love most is soap-on-a-rope.

Fatherhood is pretending the present you love most is soap-on-a-rope.

Being in the army is like being in the Boy Scouts, except that the Boy...

Being in the army is like being in the Boy Scouts, except that the Boy...

As a child, a library card takes you to exotic, faraway places. When you're grown...

As a child, a library card takes you to exotic, faraway places. When you're grown...

Why do you feel safe under blankets? Its not like a murderer will come in...

Why do you feel safe under blankets? Its not like a murderer will come in...

A true friend is one who overlooks your failures and tolerates your success!

A true friend is one who overlooks your failures and tolerates your success!

Beauty is in the heart of the beholder.

Beauty is in the heart of the beholder.

And my parents finally realise that I'm kidnapped and they snap into action immediately: they...

And my parents finally realise that I'm kidnapped and they snap into action immediately: they...

Alcohol may be man's worst enemy, but the bible says love your enemy.

Alcohol may be man's worst enemy, but the bible says love your enemy.

Life is what happens to you while you're busy making other plans

Life is what happens to you while you're busy making other plans

Common sense is merely the deposit of prejudice laid down in the human mind before...

Common sense is merely the deposit of prejudice laid down in the human mind before...

Ever have that one friend who gets a Valentine's Day gift for their mother? Doens't...

Ever have that one friend who gets a Valentine's Day gift for their mother? Doens't...

When the authorities warn you of the dangers of having sex, there is an important...

When the authorities warn you of the dangers of having sex, there is an important...

Never praise a sister to a sister in the hope of your compliments reaching the...

Never praise a sister to a sister in the hope of your compliments reaching the...

I made a killing in the stock market. My broker lost all my money, so...

I made a killing in the stock market. My broker lost all my money, so...

I went to a restaurant that serves 'breakfast at any time'. So I ordered French...

I went to a restaurant that serves 'breakfast at any time'. So I ordered French...