There's more to life than beer, but who cares

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I like nonsense it wakes up the brain cells

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You never know what you have until you clean your room

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After one look at this planet, any visitor from outer space would say I want...

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Genius is one percent inspiration, two percent perspiration, and ninety seven percent Tesla

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The world is a stage but the play is badly cast

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There has got to be more to life than just be really, really ridiculously good...

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That's the problem with drinking, I thought as I poured myself a drink. If something...

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It is easier to be a lover than a husband for the simple reason that...

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Everything I like is either illegal, immoral, fattening, expensive or impossible

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Some people claim that marriage interferes with romance.There's no doubt about it.Anytime you have a...

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Never argue with stupid people, they will drag you down to their level and then...

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The older I get, the smarter my father seems to get

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By all means marry; if you get a good wife, you'll be happy. if you...

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Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until they speak.

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I don't know who invented high heels, but all women owe him a lot

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Insanity is doing the same thing, over and over again, but expecting different results

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A quiet man is a thinking man, a quiet women is hatching plan

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