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I love walking in the rain cause no one can see me crying

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I love walking in the rain cause no one can see me crying

Ability is : When you can make three generations of people laugh their socks off...

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Ability is : When you can make three generations of people laugh their socks off...

When a baby is staring at you and their parents aren't looking

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When a baby is staring at you and their parents aren't looking

Everybody is a genius but if you judge a fish by its ability to climb...

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Everybody is a genius but if you judge a fish by its ability to climb...

Do not underestimate your abilities. That is your boss's job

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Do not underestimate your abilities. That is your boss's job

Everyone is a genius but if you judge a fish by its ability to climb...

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Everyone is a genius but if you judge a fish by its ability to climb...

Intelligence is the ability to adapt to change.

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Intelligence is the ability to adapt to change.

When 2 couples meet face to face, wives look at each other's dresses, and husbands...

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When 2 couples meet face to face, wives look at each other's dresses, and husbands...

If it weren't for pick-pocketers, I'd have no sex life at all

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If it weren't for pick-pocketers, I'd have no sex life at all

Don't have sex man. It leads to kissing and pretty soon you have to start...

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Don't have sex man. It leads to kissing and pretty soon you have to start...

Keep smiling and one day Life will get tired of upsetting you

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Keep smiling and one day Life will get tired of upsetting you

What computer do you have? And please don't say a white one.

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What computer do you have? And please don't say a white one.

Laughing at your own mistake can lengthen your life. Laughing at your wife’s mistakes can...

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Laughing at your own mistake can lengthen your life. Laughing at your wife’s mistakes can...

Happiness? A good cigar, a good meal and a good woman or a bad woman....

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Happiness? A good cigar, a good meal and a good woman or a bad woman....

I played Santa Claus many times, if you don't believe it, check out the divorce...

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I played Santa Claus many times, if you don't believe it, check out the divorce...

Im great in bed, I can sleep for days.

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Im great in bed, I can sleep for days.

How do you ask a girl out? Simple. You open the door and say "Get...

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How do you ask a girl out? Simple. You open the door and say

A word to the wise ain't necessary, it's the stupid ones who need advice.

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A word to the wise ain't necessary, it's the stupid ones who need advice.

Murphy's Law : Never sleep with anyone crazier than yourself

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Murphy's Law : Never sleep with anyone crazier than yourself

Would I rather be feared or loved. Easy, both. I want people to be afraid...

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Would I rather be feared or loved. Easy, both. I want people to be afraid...

House: No, I hired you because you look good; it's like having a nice piece...

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House: No, I hired you because you look good; it's like having a nice piece...

When you realize just how perfect everything is, you will tilt your head and laugh...

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When you realize just how perfect everything is, you will tilt your head and laugh...