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What is worth living for, and what is worth dying for The answer to each...

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What is worth living for, and what is worth dying for The answer to each...

Son, a woman is like a beer. They smell good, they look good, you'd step...

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Son, a woman is like a beer. They smell good, they look good, you'd step...

Medicine prolongs life but death will seize the doctor too

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Medicine prolongs life but death will seize the doctor too

Love me, and I will move mountains to make you happy. Hurt me, and I'll...

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Love me, and I will move mountains to make you happy. Hurt me, and I'll...

I don't know who invented high heels, but all women owe him a lot

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I don't know who invented high heels, but all women owe him a lot

Please don't lie to me, unless you're absolutely sure I'll never find out the truth.

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Please don't lie to me, unless you're absolutely sure I'll never find out the truth.

Happiness? A good cigar, a good meal and a good woman or a bad woman....

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Happiness? A good cigar, a good meal and a good woman or a bad woman....

I'm pretty sure the whole "ladies first" when opening up a door was created by...

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I'm pretty sure the whole

A good man can feel sexy, strong and able to take on the world... oh...

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A good man can feel sexy, strong and able to take on the world... oh...

The day I stop loving you is the day Lady Gaga decides to wear normal...

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The day I stop loving you is the day Lady Gaga decides to wear normal...

The reason people use crucifix against vampires is that vampires are allergic to bullshit.

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The reason people use crucifix against vampires is that vampires are allergic to bullshit.

Marry a man your own age; as your beauty fades, so will his eyesight.

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Marry a man your own age; as your beauty fades, so will his eyesight.

Sex is like math. Add the bed, subtract the clothes, divide the legs and hope...

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Sex is like math. Add the bed, subtract the clothes, divide the legs and hope...

Sex is a sensation caused by temptation. A guy sticks his location in a girl's...

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Sex is a sensation caused by temptation. A guy sticks his location in a girl's...

God, it's me, Barney. What up? I know we don't talk much, But I know...

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God, it's me, Barney. What up? I know we don't talk much, But I know...

Life isn't like a bowl of cherries, it's more like a jar of jalapenos. What...

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Life isn't like a bowl of cherries, it's more like a jar of jalapenos. What...

Facebook should have a limit on how many times you can change your relationship status....

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Facebook should have a limit on how many times you can change your relationship status....

No one will win the battle of the sexe, there is too much flirting with...

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No one will win the battle of the sexe, there is too much flirting with...

Golden rule: I do not buy dinner to get yes. Dinner's a very intimate activity....

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Golden rule: I do not buy dinner to get yes. Dinner's a very intimate activity....

I'm at the age where food has taken the place of sex in my life....

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I'm at the age where food has taken the place of sex in my life....

Don’t do drugs, don’t have unprotected sex, don’t be violent. Leave that to me.

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Don’t do drugs, don’t have unprotected sex, don’t be violent. Leave that to me.