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If at first you don't succeed, failure may be your style.

#Funny

If you have always done it that way, it is probably wrong.

#Charles Kettering

If you can't dazzle them with brilliance, baffle them with bull.

#W C Fields

1 Rule during arguments: If you're losing, start correcting their grammar.

#Arguments

If you're not a bad influence, we can't be friends.

#Bad Friends

If all you have is a hammer, everything looks like a nail.

#Bernard Baruch

If you had your life to live over again, do it overseas.

#Henny Youngman

If I don't have wisdom, I can teach you only ignorance.

#Ignorance, #Wisdom

If you're willing to chase me, I promise to run slow.

#Cute Relationship

If you desire many things, many things will seem but a few.

#Desire

If your pussy was so good, you would drive a better car.

#Katt Williams

If you can't stand the heat, get out of the kitchen.

#Harry S Truman