Home
Quotes
Picture quotes
Random
Facebook Covers
Home
Quotes
Picture quotes
Random
Facebook Covers
Obviously, if I was serious about having a relationship with some one long-term, the last...
#Chelsea Handler
At some point during almost every romantic comedy, the female lead suddenly trips and falls,...
#Chelsea Handler
I can remember my first one-night stand like it was yesterday. Well, maybe not the...
#Chelsea Handler
Why he would agree to install an eight-by-eight-foot fish tank and then not fill it...
#Chelsea Handler
My father has a high opinion of his opinion.
#Chelsea Handler
He was all emotion all the time, constantly talking about his feelings and his profound...
#Chelsea Handler
There are two kinds of people I don't trust: people who don't drink and people...
#Chelsea Handler
I think we can all agree that sleeping around is a great way to meet...
#Chelsea Handler
My relationship with my father had been on the proverbial fritz since the time I...
#Chelsea Handler
My mother told me that life isn't always about pleasing yourself and that sometimes you...
#Chelsea Handler
Along with the 97 percent of women who can see, I have never been a...
#Chelsea Handler
Most men would never tell a girl her Pikachu smells like a crab cake. It's...
#Chelsea Handler
Are you there vodka? It's me, Chelsea. Please get me out of jail and I...
#Chelsea Handler
Lydia was the kind of friend whom people referred to as a 'party favor' --...
#Chelsea Handler
I had to feign interest in all this nonsense until I could ask when I...
#Chelsea Handler
...some of the best sex I can barely remember.
#Chelsea Handler
Ivory's the kind of girl who gets drunk and immediately starts slurring. I have a...
#Chelsea Handler
I wanted to kick Bruce in the taint. No one is just one thing. Many...
#Chelsea Handler
1
2
Next
