When did I realize I was God? Well, I was praying and I suddenly realized I was talking to myself.

Quote by Peter O'Toole

Topics: Funny Quotes, God Quotes

When did I realize I was God? Well, I was praying and I suddenly realized...

When did I realize I was God? Well, I was praying and I suddenly realized...

The tooth fairy teaches children that they can sell body parts for money.

The tooth fairy teaches children that they can sell body parts for money.

By the time you're eighty years old you've learned everything. You only have to remember...

By the time you're eighty years old you've learned everything. You only have to remember...

Happiness is your dentist telling you it won't hurt and then having him catch his...

Happiness is your dentist telling you it won't hurt and then having him catch his...

Hollywood is where they shoot too many pictures and not enough actors.

Hollywood is where they shoot too many pictures and not enough actors.

Whatever you may look like, marry a man your own age as your beauty fades,...

Whatever you may look like, marry a man your own age as your beauty fades,...

Reverence is the chief joy and power of life - reverence for that which is...

Reverence is the chief joy and power of life - reverence for that which is...

The newer people, of this modern age, are more eager to amass than to realize.

The newer people, of this modern age, are more eager to amass than to realize.

I'm not overweight. I'm just nine inches too short.

I'm not overweight. I'm just nine inches too short.

Is man one of God's blunders or is God one of man's blunders?

Is man one of God's blunders or is God one of man's blunders?

An archaeologist is the best husband a woman can have. The older she gets, the...

An archaeologist is the best husband a woman can have. The older she gets, the...

Men want the same thing from their underwear that they want from women: a little...

Men want the same thing from their underwear that they want from women: a little...

You know you are getting old when the candles cost more than the cake.

You know you are getting old when the candles cost more than the cake.

I'm all about sharing the road with other drivers...as long as they use the part...

I'm all about sharing the road with other drivers...as long as they use the part...

The heresy of one age becomes the orthodoxy of the next.

The heresy of one age becomes the orthodoxy of the next.

When you look at Prince Charles, don't you think that someone in the Royal family...

When you look at Prince Charles, don't you think that someone in the Royal family...

Valentine's Day: the holiday that reminds you that if you don't have a special someone,...

Valentine's Day: the holiday that reminds you that if you don't have a special someone,...

Consider what you have in the smallest chosen library: a company of the wisest and...

Consider what you have in the smallest chosen library: a company of the wisest and...

Sometimes I wonder if men and women really suit each other. Perhaps they should live...

Sometimes I wonder if men and women really suit each other. Perhaps they should live...

God gave people a mouth that closes and ears that don't, which should tell us...

God gave people a mouth that closes and ears that don't, which should tell us...