Today, if you're not an alcoholic, you're nobody.

Quote by Dick Van Dyke

Topics: Dick Van Dyke Quotes

So I think we're kind of an alternate choice for people who have had it...

So I think we're kind of an alternate choice for people who have had it...

My kids are so much better parent than I was.

My kids are so much better parent than I was.

I think it's being thrown at the wolves, we call it in our business.

I think it's being thrown at the wolves, we call it in our business.

No, I did night clubs right here in Los Angeles. My partner, Phil Erickson, put...

No, I did night clubs right here in Los Angeles. My partner, Phil Erickson, put...

You know, I'm almost out of the habit of watching episodic television now.

You know, I'm almost out of the habit of watching episodic television now.

I don't have any children, I have four middle-aged people.

I don't have any children, I have four middle-aged people.

I turned down some movies that were quite good. mainly on the basis of taste.

I turned down some movies that were quite good. mainly on the basis of taste.

A lot of violence, a lot of gore in it, and I just didn't want...

A lot of violence, a lot of gore in it, and I just didn't want...

I've retired so many times now it's getting to be a habit.

I've retired so many times now it's getting to be a habit.

I have four children and I have seven grandkids.

I have four children and I have seven grandkids.

Oh, I had an idea for a pilot of my own at the time, and...

Oh, I had an idea for a pilot of my own at the time, and...

Stan said he used to keep Hardy late, make him miss his golf game, and...

Stan said he used to keep Hardy late, make him miss his golf game, and...

I never made a good movie.

I never made a good movie.

My son Barry, of course, has been on from the beginning. And his son Shane...

My son Barry, of course, has been on from the beginning. And his son Shane...

Women will never be as successful as men because they have no wives to advise...

Women will never be as successful as men because they have no wives to advise...

Probably one of the happiest moments, outside the birth of all of my kids, was...

Probably one of the happiest moments, outside the birth of all of my kids, was...

So at 16 I got a job at the local radio station. And I was...

So at 16 I got a job at the local radio station. And I was...

Oh, well, my first love is comedy or singing and dancing.

Oh, well, my first love is comedy or singing and dancing.

But I wish they would make a musical of some kind. I miss musicals so...

But I wish they would make a musical of some kind. I miss musicals so...

I think the saddest moment in my life just happened two months ago. My old...

I think the saddest moment in my life just happened two months ago. My old...