The only thing I have never done is a Broadway play. I'm not sure I have the discipline necessary to do a Broadway play. I know it holds a fascination for certain actors.

Quote by Bob Newhart

Topics: Bob Newhart Quotes

I think you should be a child for as long as you can. I have...

I think you should be a child for as long as you can. I have...

I was never a Certified Public Accountant. I just had a degree in accounting. It...

I was never a Certified Public Accountant. I just had a degree in accounting. It...

I'm most proud of the longevity of my marriage, my kids, and my grandchildren. If...

I'm most proud of the longevity of my marriage, my kids, and my grandchildren. If...

This stammer got me a home in Beverly Hills, and I'm not about to screw...

This stammer got me a home in Beverly Hills, and I'm not about to screw...

Comedians are never really on vacation because you're always at attention... that antenna is always...

Comedians are never really on vacation because you're always at attention... that antenna is always...

I'm very open to the up-and-comers.

I'm very open to the up-and-comers.

Funny is funny is funny.

Funny is funny is funny.

Laughter gives us distance. It allows us to step back from an event, deal with...

Laughter gives us distance. It allows us to step back from an event, deal with...

I was influenced by every comedian I ever saw work. That's the only way you...

I was influenced by every comedian I ever saw work. That's the only way you...

When I started out in 1960, I thought it might possibly last a couple of...

When I started out in 1960, I thought it might possibly last a couple of...

I don't like country music, but I don't mean to denigrate those who do. And...

I don't like country music, but I don't mean to denigrate those who do. And...

I don't have a stack of scripts.

I don't have a stack of scripts.

It was a decision to work clean. I just prefer to work that way. I...

It was a decision to work clean. I just prefer to work that way. I...

The first time I got up in front of an audience was terror, abject terror,...

The first time I got up in front of an audience was terror, abject terror,...

It's getting harder and harder to differentiate between schizophrenics and people talking on a cell...

It's getting harder and harder to differentiate between schizophrenics and people talking on a cell...

Jack Benny was, without a doubt, the bravest comedian I have ever seen work. He...

Jack Benny was, without a doubt, the bravest comedian I have ever seen work. He...

I don't know how many sacred cows there are today. I think there's a little...

I don't know how many sacred cows there are today. I think there's a little...

Lesbian humor isn't trying to sell anything, it doesn't have to sell out. Coming out...

Lesbian humor isn't trying to sell anything, it doesn't have to sell out. Coming out...

A woman may develop wrinkles and cellulite, lose her waistline, her bustline, her ability to...

A woman may develop wrinkles and cellulite, lose her waistline, her bustline, her ability to...

Defining and analyzing humor is a pastime of humorless people.

Defining and analyzing humor is a pastime of humorless people.