That uncomfortable moment when you're in the car and you look at the people in the car next to you. Then you realize they're already looking at you...

Topics: Funny Facebook Status Quotes

Online dating is now like eating at Denny's thanks to photoshop, in person your order...

Online dating is now like eating at Denny's thanks to photoshop, in person your order...

That one annoying relative who comments on everything you do on Facebook.

That one annoying relative who comments on everything you do on Facebook.

If someone texts 'K', just reply with 'L M N O P Q R S...

If someone texts 'K', just reply with 'L M N O P Q R S...

Sunglasses allow an individual to stare at people without them knowing. It is Facebook in...

Sunglasses allow an individual to stare at people without them knowing. It is Facebook in...

Friends are like condoms. They are always there to protect you when things get hard.

Friends are like condoms. They are always there to protect you when things get hard.

Apple was considering making an iPod for kids but apparently, the name 'iTouch Kids' didn't...

Apple was considering making an iPod for kids but apparently, the name 'iTouch Kids' didn't...

I named my hard drive 'That Ass' so once a month my computer asks me...

I named my hard drive 'That Ass' so once a month my computer asks me...

That awkward moment when you try to sing a duet with yourself.

That awkward moment when you try to sing a duet with yourself.

If you watch Jaws backwards; it's actually a film about a shark that throws up...

If you watch Jaws backwards; it's actually a film about a shark that throws up...

It's a recipe for disaster when your country has an obesity epidemic and a skinny...

It's a recipe for disaster when your country has an obesity epidemic and a skinny...

That awkward moment during a test and you don't know any of the answers, so...

That awkward moment during a test and you don't know any of the answers, so...

Nothing makes me want a relationship to fail more than matching profile pictures.

I wonder if a receptionist at a sperm bank has ever used the phrase: 'Thanks...

I wonder if a receptionist at a sperm bank has ever used the phrase: 'Thanks...

Scientists have yet to explain how 300 people can be working at a Wal-Mart but...

Scientists have yet to explain how 300 people can be working at a Wal-Mart but...

I probably could stand a chance on American Idol if I could bring my shower...

I probably could stand a chance on American Idol if I could bring my shower...

Sex is like high school...you miss a period and you're in trouble.

Sex is like high school...you miss a period and you're in trouble.

Calories are just little tiny creatures that live in your closet and sew your clothes...

Calories are just little tiny creatures that live in your closet and sew your clothes...

Spent the entire night trying to create a website for women drivers, but it kept...

Spent the entire night trying to create a website for women drivers, but it kept...