TEETOTALER, n. One who abstains from strong drink, sometimes totally, sometimes tolerably totally.

Quote by Ambrose Bierce

Topics: Drink Quotes

Edible, adj.: Good to eat, and wholesome to digest, as a worm to a toad,...

Edible, adj.: Good to eat, and wholesome to digest, as a worm to a toad,...

READING, n. The general body of what one reads. In our country it consists, as...

READING, n. The general body of what one reads. In our country it consists, as...

Bore: a person who talks when you wish him to listen.

Bore: a person who talks when you wish him to listen.

Architect. One who drafts a plan of your house, and plans a draft of your...

Architect. One who drafts a plan of your house, and plans a draft of your...

I never said all Democrats were saloonkeepers. What I said was that all saloonkeepers are...

I never said all Democrats were saloonkeepers. What I said was that all saloonkeepers are...

SAFETY-CLUTCH, n. A mechanical device acting automatically to prevent the fall of an elevator, or...

SAFETY-CLUTCH, n. A mechanical device acting automatically to prevent the fall of an elevator, or...

Who never doubted, never half believed. Where doubt is, there truth is - it is...

Who never doubted, never half believed. Where doubt is, there truth is - it is...

I think love is the most unbelievable, and critical, thing in civilization. Everything else is...

I think love is the most unbelievable, and critical, thing in civilization. Everything else is...

PRESIDENCY, n. The greased pig in the field game of American politics.

PRESIDENCY, n. The greased pig in the field game of American politics.

There are 4 kinds of Homicide: felonious, excusable, justifiable, and praiseworthy.

There are 4 kinds of Homicide: felonious, excusable, justifiable, and praiseworthy.

OBSESSED, p.p. Vexed by an evil spirit, like the Gadarene swine and other critics. Obsession...

OBSESSED, p.p. Vexed by an evil spirit, like the Gadarene swine and other critics. Obsession...

Eulogy. Praise of a person who has either the advantages of wealth and power, or...

Eulogy. Praise of a person who has either the advantages of wealth and power, or...

Philosophy: A route of many roads leading from nowhere to nothing.

Philosophy: A route of many roads leading from nowhere to nothing.

Mythology: the body of a primitive people's beliefs, concerning its origin, early history, heroes, deities...

Mythology: the body of a primitive people's beliefs, concerning its origin, early history, heroes, deities...

Deliberation, n.: The act of examining one's bread to determine which side it is buttered...

Deliberation, n.: The act of examining one's bread to determine which side it is buttered...

To be positive is to be mistaken at the top of one's voice.

To be positive is to be mistaken at the top of one's voice.

RECOUNT, n. In American politics, another throw of the dice, accorded to the player against...

RECOUNT, n. In American politics, another throw of the dice, accorded to the player against...

REVELATION, n. A famous book in which St. John the Divine concealed all that he...

REVELATION, n. A famous book in which St. John the Divine concealed all that he...

Life can only be understood backwards, but it must be lived forward.

Life can only be understood backwards, but it must be lived forward.

You can get awful famous in this country in seven days.

You can get awful famous in this country in seven days.