Put it back in the horse! [on tasting his first American beer].

Quote by H Allen Smith

Topics: Beer Quotes

On Monday mornings I am dedicated to the proposition that all men are created jerks.

On Monday mornings I am dedicated to the proposition that all men are created jerks.

The human animal differs from the lesser primates in his passion for lists.

The human animal differs from the lesser primates in his passion for lists.

Time is never wasted when you're wasted all the time.

Time is never wasted when you're wasted all the time.

Here's to alcohol: the cause of, and solution to, all of life's problems.

Here's to alcohol: the cause of, and solution to, all of life's problems.

An intelligent man is sometimes forced to be drunk to spend time with his fools.

An intelligent man is sometimes forced to be drunk to spend time with his fools.

The mouth of a perfectly happy man is filled with beer.

The mouth of a perfectly happy man is filled with beer.

Give me a woman who loves beer and I will conquer the world.

Give me a woman who loves beer and I will conquer the world.

I'd rather have a bottle in front of me, than a frontal lobotomy.

I'd rather have a bottle in front of me, than a frontal lobotomy.

I would kill everyone in this room for a drop of sweet beer.

I would kill everyone in this room for a drop of sweet beer.

It is amazing how many times the words 'I need another drink' has bailed me...

It is amazing how many times the words 'I need another drink' has bailed me...

Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy.

Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy.

A fine beer may be judged with only one sip, but it's better to be...

A fine beer may be judged with only one sip, but it's better to be...

She came onto him like a slow movin' cold front -- His beer was warmer...

She came onto him like a slow movin' cold front -- His beer was warmer...

I'm gonna drink lots of beer and stay out all night.

I'm gonna drink lots of beer and stay out all night.

You can't be a real country unless you have a beer and an airline -...

You can't be a real country unless you have a beer and an airline -...

I fear the man who drinks water and so remembers this morning what the rest...

I fear the man who drinks water and so remembers this morning what the rest...

Drinking beer doesn't make you fat, It makes you lean.... Against bars, tables, chairs, and...

Drinking beer doesn't make you fat, It makes you lean.... Against bars, tables, chairs, and...

My friend has a baby, I am recording all the noises he makes so I...

My friend has a baby, I am recording all the noises he makes so I...

Filled with mingled cream and amber I will drain that glass again. Such hilarious visions...

Filled with mingled cream and amber I will drain that glass again. Such hilarious visions...