One of the universal rules of happiness is: always be wary of any helpful item that weighs less than its operating manual.

Quote by Terry Pratchett

Topics: Funny Quotes, Happiness Quotes

Writing is the most fun you can have by yourself.

Writing is the most fun you can have by yourself.

Elves are wonderful. They provoke wonder. Elves are marvellous. They cause marvels. Elves are fantastic....

Elves are wonderful. They provoke wonder. Elves are marvellous. They cause marvels. Elves are fantastic....

Only in our dreams are we free. The rest of the time we need wages.

Only in our dreams are we free. The rest of the time we need wages.

And therefore education at the University mostly worked by the age-old method of putting a...

And therefore education at the University mostly worked by the age-old method of putting a...

Fantasy is an exercise bicycle for the mind. It might not take you anywhere, but...

Fantasy is an exercise bicycle for the mind. It might not take you anywhere, but...

Five exclamation marks, the sure sign of an insane mind.

Five exclamation marks, the sure sign of an insane mind.

Taxation is just a sophisticated way of demanding money with menaces

Taxation is just a sophisticated way of demanding money with menaces

It's not worth doing something unless you were doing something that someone, somewere, would much...

It's not worth doing something unless you were doing something that someone, somewere, would much...

They say a little knowledge is a dangerous thing, but it's not one half so...

They say a little knowledge is a dangerous thing, but it's not one half so...

The universe, they said, depended for its operation on the balance of four forces which...

The universe, they said, depended for its operation on the balance of four forces which...

Light thinks it travels faster than anything but it is wrong. No matter how fast...

Light thinks it travels faster than anything but it is wrong. No matter how fast...

The intelligence of the creature known as a crowd, is the square root of the...

The intelligence of the creature known as a crowd, is the square root of the...

Sometimes it is better to light a flamethrower than curse the darkness.

Sometimes it is better to light a flamethrower than curse the darkness.

Death was Nature's way of telling you to slow down.

Death was Nature's way of telling you to slow down.

If there was anything that depressed him more than his own cynicism, it was that...

If there was anything that depressed him more than his own cynicism, it was that...

Build a man a fire, and he'll be warm for a day. Set a man...

Build a man a fire, and he'll be warm for a day. Set a man...

Only in our dreams are we free. The rest of the time we need wages

Only in our dreams are we free. The rest of the time we need wages

He was the sort of person who stood on mountaintops during thunderstorms in wet copper...

He was the sort of person who stood on mountaintops during thunderstorms in wet copper...

The trouble with having an open mind, of course, is that people will insist on...

The trouble with having an open mind, of course, is that people will insist on...

The truth may be out there, but lies are inside your head.

The truth may be out there, but lies are inside your head.