Oh, look at the time.... The big hand says Fuck, and the little hand says Off..... Good thing there's not a second hand. I'm goin' in.

Quote by Hank Moody

Topics: Californication Quotes

Well, you should've called. I wouldn't have answered, but you coulda left a message, which...

Well, you should've called. I wouldn't have answered, but you coulda left a message, which...

You can't snort a line of coke off a womans a** and not wonder about...

You can't snort a line of coke off a womans a** and not wonder about...

Could I get a jumbo order of what the fuck were you thinking

Could I get a jumbo order of what the fuck were you thinking

I have found that the back tat is the watermark of the promiscuous.

I have found that the back tat is the watermark of the promiscuous.

A BRONER!!! An unintentional male inspired b*ner.. thats the word I'm looking for

A BRONER!!! An unintentional male inspired b*ner.. thats the word I'm looking for

Now you're giving me that look, right now, look like I fingerbanged your cat.

Now you're giving me that look, right now, look like I fingerbanged your cat.

Nobody likes you. You're ugly and your mother dresses you funny. Now smile you f*****g...

Nobody likes you. You're ugly and your mother dresses you funny. Now smile you f*****g...

You can't snort a line of coke off a womans ass and not wonder about...

You can't snort a line of coke off a womans ass and not wonder about...

Yo K-Fed, the little man in the boat, he's up here! That's where he is...

Yo K-Fed, the little man in the boat, he's up here! That's where he is...

Oh god, pity those poor kids who are never going to forget this image of...

Oh god, pity those poor kids who are never going to forget this image of...

Rehab is for Quitters.

Rehab is for Quitters.

Thats right, I said it, I meant it, Im here to represent it.

Thats right, I said it, I meant it, Im here to represent it.

To quote The Clash, should I stay or should I rock the casbah?

To quote The Clash, should I stay or should I rock the casbah?

Oh, and it'd be nice if I could fellate myself while farting the White album,...

Oh, and it'd be nice if I could fellate myself while farting the White album,...

Oh, look at the time....The big hand says F**k, and the little hand says Off....Good...

Oh, look at the time....The big hand says F**k, and the little hand says Off....Good...

You're looking at me like I just finger-b****d your cat.

You're looking at me like I just finger-b****d your cat.

I probably won't go down in history, but I will go down on your sister....

I probably won't go down in history, but I will go down on your sister....

People... they don't write anymore - they blog. Instead of talking, they text, no punctuation,...

People... they don't write anymore - they blog. Instead of talking, they text, no punctuation,...

Wine is fine but whisky's quicker.

Wine is fine but whisky's quicker.

You looking for a dick punch?

You looking for a dick punch?