You kicked my dick out of the house. You made my dick homeless. And out of doors is a place where penises dont generally fare well. So my homeless dick now must seek shelter where and whence it can.

Quote by Hank Moody

Topics: Hank Moody Quotes

She's got a nose ring too. You know what that means.

She's got a nose ring too. You know what that means.

I love women. I have all their albums.

I love women. I have all their albums.

She takes after her mother. The make-up and the slutty clothes.

She takes after her mother. The make-up and the slutty clothes.

Now you're giving me that look, right now, look like I fingerbanged your cat.

Now you're giving me that look, right now, look like I fingerbanged your cat.

I went there to kick his ass, and I stayed to soak up his wisdom.

I went there to kick his ass, and I stayed to soak up his wisdom.

Do you want me to want you to suck my c*ck

Do you want me to want you to suck my c*ck

All those things that werent supposed to happen? They happened. What happens next is up...

All those things that werent supposed to happen? They happened. What happens next is up...

Well, you should've called. I wouldn't have answered, but you coulda left a message, which...

Well, you should've called. I wouldn't have answered, but you coulda left a message, which...

People... they don't write anymore - they blog. Instead of talking, they text, no punctuation,...

People... they don't write anymore - they blog. Instead of talking, they text, no punctuation,...

Oh, look at the time....The big hand says F**k, and the little hand says Off....Good...

Oh, look at the time....The big hand says F**k, and the little hand says Off....Good...

Don't tell me what to feel. All my fuckin' life people have been telling me...

Don't tell me what to feel. All my fuckin' life people have been telling me...

Oh god, pity those poor kids who are never going to forget this image of...

Oh god, pity those poor kids who are never going to forget this image of...

To quote The Clash, should I stay or should I rock the casbah?

To quote The Clash, should I stay or should I rock the casbah?

A morning of awkwardness is far better than a night of loneliness.

A morning of awkwardness is far better than a night of loneliness.

I love all women. I love you. I'll make a run at you... Krusty. I...

I love all women. I love you. I'll make a run at you... Krusty. I...

You're looking at me like I just finger-b****d your cat.

You're looking at me like I just finger-b****d your cat.

Yo K-Fed, the little man in the boat, he's up here! That's where he is...

Yo K-Fed, the little man in the boat, he's up here! That's where he is...

Rehab is for Quitters.

Rehab is for Quitters.

Oh, look at the time.... The big hand says Fuck, and the little hand says...

Oh, look at the time.... The big hand says Fuck, and the little hand says...

You can't snort a line of coke off a womans ass and not wonder about...

You can't snort a line of coke off a womans ass and not wonder about...