Never wear anything that panics the cat.

Quote by P J O'Rourke

Topics: Funny Quotes

Giving money and power to government is like giving whiskey and car keys to teenage...

Giving money and power to government is like giving whiskey and car keys to teenage...

I suppose I should get a VCR, but the only thing I like about television...

I suppose I should get a VCR, but the only thing I like about television...

No drug, not even alcohol, causes the fundamental ills of society. If we're looking for...

No drug, not even alcohol, causes the fundamental ills of society. If we're looking for...

Whatever it is that the government does, sensible Americans would prefer that the government does...

Whatever it is that the government does, sensible Americans would prefer that the government does...

Whatever it is that the government does, sensible Americans would prefer that the government does...

Whatever it is that the government does, sensible Americans would prefer that the government does...

If government were a product, selling it would be illegal.

If government were a product, selling it would be illegal.

Politicians are wonderful people as long as they stay away from things they don't understand,...

Politicians are wonderful people as long as they stay away from things they don't understand,...

Let's reintroduce corporal punishment in the schools - and use it on the teachers.

Let's reintroduce corporal punishment in the schools - and use it on the teachers.

When a couple decide to divorce, they should inform both sets of parents before having...

When a couple decide to divorce, they should inform both sets of parents before having...

There are a number of mechanical devices which increase sexual arousal, particularly in women. Chief...

There are a number of mechanical devices which increase sexual arousal, particularly in women. Chief...

Let's reintroduce corporal punishment in the schools - and use it on the teachers.

Let's reintroduce corporal punishment in the schools - and use it on the teachers.

The government is huge, stupid, greedy and makes nosy, officious and dangerous intrusions into the...

The government is huge, stupid, greedy and makes nosy, officious and dangerous intrusions into the...

If government were a product, selling it would be illegal.

If government were a product, selling it would be illegal.

What use is it to endure the Dutch Rubs and Indian Rope Burns that are...

What use is it to endure the Dutch Rubs and Indian Rope Burns that are...

A very quiet and tasteful way to be famous is to have a famous relative....

A very quiet and tasteful way to be famous is to have a famous relative....

Social Security is a government program with a constituency made up of the old, the...

Social Security is a government program with a constituency made up of the old, the...

A very quiet and tasteful way to be famous is to have a famous relative....

A very quiet and tasteful way to be famous is to have a famous relative....

The government is huge, stupid, greedy and makes nosy, officious and dangerous intrusions into the...

The government is huge, stupid, greedy and makes nosy, officious and dangerous intrusions into the...

Liberal Democrats are inexorably opposed to tax cuts, because tax cuts give people more power,...

Liberal Democrats are inexorably opposed to tax cuts, because tax cuts give people more power,...

Critics say Arnold has no previous government experience, but advisers say he's clearly the most...

Critics say Arnold has no previous government experience, but advisers say he's clearly the most...