My Mom said she learned how to swim when someone took her out in the lake and threw her off the boat. I said, 'Mom, they weren't trying to teach you how to swim.'

Quote by Paula Poundstone

Topics: Paula Poundstone Quotes

The wages of sin are death, but by the time taxes are taken out, it's...

The wages of sin are death, but by the time taxes are taken out, it's...

I was born in Alabama, but I only lived there for a month before I'd...

I was born in Alabama, but I only lived there for a month before I'd...

The wages of sin are death, but by the time taxes are taken out, it's...

The wages of sin are death, but by the time taxes are taken out, it's...

The problem with cats is that they get the exact same look on their face...

The problem with cats is that they get the exact same look on their face...

Adults are always asking kids what they want to be when they grow up because...

Adults are always asking kids what they want to be when they grow up because...

The wages of sin are death, but after they take the taxes out, it's more...

The wages of sin are death, but after they take the taxes out, it's more...

Adults are always asking little kids what they want to be when they grow up...

Adults are always asking little kids what they want to be when they grow up...

I don't have a bank account because I don't know my mother's maiden name.

I don't have a bank account because I don't know my mother's maiden name.

The law must be stable, but it must not stand still.

The law must be stable, but it must not stand still.

The problem with cats is that they get the same exact look whether they see...

The problem with cats is that they get the same exact look whether they see...

Even a wolf will not stay - Where sounds no bleat to offer hope of...

Even a wolf will not stay - Where sounds no bleat to offer hope of...

You can't stay in your corner of the Forest waiting for others to come to...

You can't stay in your corner of the Forest waiting for others to come to...

Did you ever notice when you blow in a dog's face he gets mad at...

Did you ever notice when you blow in a dog's face he gets mad at...

Another Farmville invite and I'll take your animals and burn your crops.

Another Farmville invite and I'll take your animals and burn your crops.

Identity is such a crucial affair that one shouldn't rush into it.

Identity is such a crucial affair that one shouldn't rush into it.

The cat has nine lives: three for playing, three for straying, three for staying

The cat has nine lives: three for playing, three for straying, three for staying

A rat is not born a rabbit

A rat is not born a rabbit

Cats are rather delicate creatures and they are subject to a good many different ailments,...

Cats are rather delicate creatures and they are subject to a good many different ailments,...

Sharks have been swimming the oceans unchallenged for thousands of years; chances are, the species...

Sharks have been swimming the oceans unchallenged for thousands of years; chances are, the species...

I don't like small birds. They hop around so merrily outside my window, looking so...

I don't like small birds. They hop around so merrily outside my window, looking so...