Instead of a trap door, what about a trap window? The guy looks out it, and if he leans too far, he falls out. Wait. I guess that's like a regular window.

Quote by Jack Handy

Topics: Love Quotes

It's interesting to think that my ancestors used to live in the trees, like apes,...

It's interesting to think that my ancestors used to live in the trees, like apes,...

As the light changed from red to green to yellow and back to red again,...

As the light changed from red to green to yellow and back to red again,...

I think a good product would be Baby Duck Hat. It's a fake baby duck,...

I think a good product would be Baby Duck Hat. It's a fake baby duck,...

I guess I kinda lost control, because in the middle of the play I ran...

I guess I kinda lost control, because in the middle of the play I ran...

To me, boxing is like a ballet, except there's no music, no choreography, and the...

To me, boxing is like a ballet, except there's no music, no choreography, and the...

One thing vampire children have to be taught early on is, don't run with wooden...

One thing vampire children have to be taught early on is, don't run with wooden...

The tired and thirsty prospector threw himself down at the edge of the watering hole...

The tired and thirsty prospector threw himself down at the edge of the watering hole...

Probably the earliest fly swatters were nothing more than some sort of striking surface attached...

Probably the earliest fly swatters were nothing more than some sort of striking surface attached...

To me, it's a good idea to always carry two sacks of something when you...

To me, it's a good idea to always carry two sacks of something when you...

It's easy to sit there and say you'd like to have more money. And I...

It's easy to sit there and say you'd like to have more money. And I...

I'd like to see a nude opera, because when they hit those high notes, I...

I'd like to see a nude opera, because when they hit those high notes, I...

Whenever you read a good book, it's like the author is right there, in the...

Whenever you read a good book, it's like the author is right there, in the...

I don't like small birds. They hop around so merrily outside my window, looking so...

I don't like small birds. They hop around so merrily outside my window, looking so...

It's true that every time you hear a bell, an angel gets its wings. But...

It's true that every time you hear a bell, an angel gets its wings. But...

If you go flying back through time and you see somebody else flying forward into...

If you go flying back through time and you see somebody else flying forward into...

If you think a weakness can be turned into a strength, I hate to tell...

If you think a weakness can be turned into a strength, I hate to tell...

I hope that after I die, people will say of me: That guy sure owed...

I hope that after I die, people will say of me: That guy sure owed...

Those that marry for money sell their liberty.

Those that marry for money sell their liberty.

Ready money works great cures

Ready money works great cures

The only reason I made a commercial for American Express was to pay for my...

The only reason I made a commercial for American Express was to pay for my...