I'm on performance enhancing drugs, so I may cause drowsiness.

Quote by Jay London

Topics: Jay London Quotes

Did you know that today will never be tomorrow.

Did you know that today will never be tomorrow.

They asked me what I thought about euthanasia. I said I'm more concerned about the...

They asked me what I thought about euthanasia. I said I'm more concerned about the...

My girlfriend has crabs, I bought her fishnet stockings.

My girlfriend has crabs, I bought her fishnet stockings.

I wanted to take up music, so my father bought me a blunt instrument. He...

I wanted to take up music, so my father bought me a blunt instrument. He...

I went to the store and bought lady fingers, when I got home I noticed...

I went to the store and bought lady fingers, when I got home I noticed...

People read me but they don't subscribe.

People read me but they don't subscribe.

Does anybody know what I'm doing up here?

Does anybody know what I'm doing up here?

My whole family is lactose intolerant and when we take pictures we can't say cheese.

My whole family is lactose intolerant and when we take pictures we can't say cheese.

My boss told me to get my butt in gear. I told him I was...

My boss told me to get my butt in gear. I told him I was...

I was lonely driving here tonight so I hugged the road.

I was lonely driving here tonight so I hugged the road.

I model irregular clothing.

I model irregular clothing.

I don't need to worry about identity theft because no one wants to be me.

I don't need to worry about identity theft because no one wants to be me.

I saw a sign it said left lane closed so I went someplace else.

I saw a sign it said left lane closed so I went someplace else.

A window of opportunity for me usually involves a rock.

A window of opportunity for me usually involves a rock.

I went to a urologist - he told me I could go at any time.

I went to a urologist - he told me I could go at any time.

I recorded my hair this morning, tonight I'm watching the highlights.

I recorded my hair this morning, tonight I'm watching the highlights.

I went out with a promiscuous impressionist - she did everybody.

I went out with a promiscuous impressionist - she did everybody.

I saw a stationery store move.

I saw a stationery store move.

I once dated a weather girl, we talked up a storm.

I once dated a weather girl, we talked up a storm.

I wanted to join the Army the sign said 'Be All That You Can Be',...

I wanted to join the Army the sign said 'Be All That You Can Be',...