I trained to be a priest - started to. I went to seminary school when I was 11. I wanted to be a priest, but when they told me I could never have sex, not even on my birthday, I…

Quote by Johnny Vegas

Topics: Johnny Vegas Quotes

I used to be good with kids, but as I get older, I'm grumpy and...

I used to be good with kids, but as I get older, I'm grumpy and...

For the greater good, I thought I should be a spiritual leader for people for...

For the greater good, I thought I should be a spiritual leader for people for...

We all have days where we can't pronounce things or give it the emotion it...

We all have days where we can't pronounce things or give it the emotion it...

With stand-up you've just got that one chance. Audiences can be quite fickle.

With stand-up you've just got that one chance. Audiences can be quite fickle.

I've got too much respect for stand-ups to call myself one.

I've got too much respect for stand-ups to call myself one.

There's lots of stuff about me being a fan of Cliff but not being gay....

There's lots of stuff about me being a fan of Cliff but not being gay....

This autocue was obviously written for someone else and I've been brought in at the...

This autocue was obviously written for someone else and I've been brought in at the...

You can sway an audience if you win the women over. The gentlemen will follow...

You can sway an audience if you win the women over. The gentlemen will follow...

When I wasn't as attractive as I am now, I suffered at the hands of...

When I wasn't as attractive as I am now, I suffered at the hands of...

I've got little ankles and a bit of a belly, so it makes me look...

I've got little ankles and a bit of a belly, so it makes me look...

I also want to return to doing stand-up. I've become frightened of live audiences. This...

I also want to return to doing stand-up. I've become frightened of live audiences. This...

You can't be a proper comic unless you've been out on stage and felt the...

You can't be a proper comic unless you've been out on stage and felt the...

Baldness is visually enough of a stigma as it is without a big sweaty bloke...

Baldness is visually enough of a stigma as it is without a big sweaty bloke...

It is easy for me to love myself, but for ladies to do it is...

It is easy for me to love myself, but for ladies to do it is...

We had a week off in the middle of shooting, but as soon as everyone...

We had a week off in the middle of shooting, but as soon as everyone...

If an original piece of wardrobe came up from Star Wars, I'd probably spend a...

If an original piece of wardrobe came up from Star Wars, I'd probably spend a...

I always feel like an interloper when I do serious drama. It's my own paranoia.

I always feel like an interloper when I do serious drama. It's my own paranoia.

I actually enjoy being heckled; it keeps it interesting, and I think it is a...

I actually enjoy being heckled; it keeps it interesting, and I think it is a...

They look outside the windows of their apartment in town and realize they're not living...

They look outside the windows of their apartment in town and realize they're not living...

I'm getting positive feedback for my acting so we'll see if any other interesting parts...

I'm getting positive feedback for my acting so we'll see if any other interesting parts...