I love being a writer. What I can't stand is the paperwork.

Quote by Peter De Vries

Topics: Funny Quotes, Writers Quotes

Celibacy is the worst form of self-abuse.

Celibacy is the worst form of self-abuse.

We are not primarily put on this earth to see through one another, but to...

We are not primarily put on this earth to see through one another, but to...

Gluttony is an emotional escape, a sign something is eating us.

Gluttony is an emotional escape, a sign something is eating us.

The tuba is certainly the most intestinal of instruments, the very lower bowel of music.

The tuba is certainly the most intestinal of instruments, the very lower bowel of music.

Let us hope, that a kind Providence will put a speedy end to the acts...

Let us hope, that a kind Providence will put a speedy end to the acts...

We must love one another, yes, yes, that's all true enough, but nothing says we...

We must love one another, yes, yes, that's all true enough, but nothing says we...

My father hated radio and could not wait for television to be invented so he...

My father hated radio and could not wait for television to be invented so he...

Confession is good for the soul only in the sense that a tweed coat is...

Confession is good for the soul only in the sense that a tweed coat is...

The bonds of matrimony are like any other bonds - they mature slowly.

The bonds of matrimony are like any other bonds - they mature slowly.

I am not impressed by the Ivy League establishments. Of course they graduate the best...

I am not impressed by the Ivy League establishments. Of course they graduate the best...

A suburban mother's role is to deliver children obstetrically once, and by car forever after.

A suburban mother's role is to deliver children obstetrically once, and by car forever after.

I wanted to be bored to death, as good a way to go as any.

I wanted to be bored to death, as good a way to go as any.

Who of us is mature enough for offspring before the offspring themselves arrive? The value...

Who of us is mature enough for offspring before the offspring themselves arrive? The value...

Marriage is a lottery in which men stake their liberty and women their happiness

Marriage is a lottery in which men stake their liberty and women their happiness

Confession is good for the soul only in the sense that a tweed coat is...

Confession is good for the soul only in the sense that a tweed coat is...

The murals in restaurants are on par with the food in museums.

The murals in restaurants are on par with the food in museums.

Pain is the question mark turned like a fishhook in the human heart.

Pain is the question mark turned like a fishhook in the human heart.

The rich aren't like us, they pay less taxes.

The rich aren't like us, they pay less taxes.

Celibacy is the worst form of self-abuse.

Celibacy is the worst form of self-abuse.

There are times when parenthood seems nothing more than feeding the hand that bites you.

There are times when parenthood seems nothing more than feeding the hand that bites you.