I have never been jealous. Not even when my dad finished fifth grade a year before I did.

Quote by Jeff Foxworthy

Topics: Funny Quotes, Jealousy Quotes

I tried real hard to play golf, and I was so bad at it they...

I tried real hard to play golf, and I was so bad at it they...

If you own a home with wheels on it and several cars without, you just...

If you own a home with wheels on it and several cars without, you just...

The stuff that made me mad 20 years ago doesn't really make me mad any...

The stuff that made me mad 20 years ago doesn't really make me mad any...

For the first time ever I was taking the family on the road. We stayed...

For the first time ever I was taking the family on the road. We stayed...

Changing a diaper is a lot like getting a present from your grandmother - you're...

Changing a diaper is a lot like getting a present from your grandmother - you're...

I turned down a movie this summer because it was nine weeks in Vancouver and...

I turned down a movie this summer because it was nine weeks in Vancouver and...

Have you ever seen people so ugly that you have to get someone else to...

Have you ever seen people so ugly that you have to get someone else to...

I call our bathroom 'The Vault' because the door's always locked and whatever goes on...

I call our bathroom 'The Vault' because the door's always locked and whatever goes on...

Did you know babies are nauseated by the smell of a clean shirt?

Did you know babies are nauseated by the smell of a clean shirt?

It's a weird sensation to be mad and learning at the same time.

It's a weird sensation to be mad and learning at the same time.

If your neighbors think you're a detective because a cop always brings you home, you...

If your neighbors think you're a detective because a cop always brings you home, you...

Nothing in life prepares you to be famous.

Nothing in life prepares you to be famous.

It's hard to think of yourself as a loser at 2 years old.

It's hard to think of yourself as a loser at 2 years old.

I had to perform at the White House for the president, That's always kind of...

I had to perform at the White House for the president, That's always kind of...

I say, If everybody in this house lives where it's God first, friends and family...

I say, If everybody in this house lives where it's God first, friends and family...

I have never been jealous. Not even when my dad finished fifth grade a year...

I have never been jealous. Not even when my dad finished fifth grade a year...

Pride is the first step in people unraveling and companies unraveling and relationships unraveling.

Pride is the first step in people unraveling and companies unraveling and relationships unraveling.

When you get to your third millionth frequent flyer mile, I think something snaps in...

When you get to your third millionth frequent flyer mile, I think something snaps in...

If men have a smell it's usually an accident.

If men have a smell it's usually an accident.

What I hated was doing what somebody in LA thought Jeff Foxworthy ought to do.

What I hated was doing what somebody in LA thought Jeff Foxworthy ought to do.