I don't know how many sacred cows there are today. I think there's a little confusion between humor and gross passing for humor. That's kind of regrettable.

Quote by Bob Newhart

Topics: Humor Quotes

I was never a Certified Public Accountant. I just had a degree in accounting. It...

I was never a Certified Public Accountant. I just had a degree in accounting. It...

It's getting harder and harder to differentiate between schizophrenics and people talking on a cell...

It's getting harder and harder to differentiate between schizophrenics and people talking on a cell...

The only thing I have never done is a Broadway play. I'm not sure I...

The only thing I have never done is a Broadway play. I'm not sure I...

Comedians are never really on vacation because you're always at attention... that antenna is always...

Comedians are never really on vacation because you're always at attention... that antenna is always...

Funny is funny is funny.

Funny is funny is funny.

All I can say about life is, 'Oh God, enjoy it!'

All I can say about life is, 'Oh God, enjoy it!'

It was a decision to work clean. I just prefer to work that way. I...

It was a decision to work clean. I just prefer to work that way. I...

I'm very open to the up-and-comers.

I'm very open to the up-and-comers.

I don't like country music, but I don't mean to denigrate those who do. And...

I don't like country music, but I don't mean to denigrate those who do. And...

I've been a very lucky actor.

I've been a very lucky actor.

Laughter gives us distance. It allows us to step back from an event, deal with...

Laughter gives us distance. It allows us to step back from an event, deal with...

Laughter gives us distance. It allows us to step back from an event, deal with...

Laughter gives us distance. It allows us to step back from an event, deal with...

I think you should be a child for as long as you can. I have...

I think you should be a child for as long as you can. I have...

I don't have a stack of scripts.

I don't have a stack of scripts.

The first time I got up in front of an audience was terror, abject terror,...

The first time I got up in front of an audience was terror, abject terror,...

When I started out in 1960, I thought it might possibly last a couple of...

When I started out in 1960, I thought it might possibly last a couple of...

I was influenced by every comedian I ever saw work. That's the only way you...

I was influenced by every comedian I ever saw work. That's the only way you...

I'm most proud of the longevity of my marriage, my kids, and my grandchildren. If...

I'm most proud of the longevity of my marriage, my kids, and my grandchildren. If...

This stammer got me a home in Beverly Hills, and I'm not about to screw...

This stammer got me a home in Beverly Hills, and I'm not about to screw...

Jack Benny was, without a doubt, the bravest comedian I have ever seen work. He...

Jack Benny was, without a doubt, the bravest comedian I have ever seen work. He...