I argue very well. Ask any of my remaining friends. I can win an argument on any topic, against any opponent. People know this, and steer clear of me at parties. Often, as a sign of their great respect, they…

Quote by Dave Barry

Topics: Friendship Quotes, Love Quotes

We journalists make it a point to know very little about an extremely wide variety...

We journalists make it a point to know very little about an extremely wide variety...

Thus the metric system did not really catch on in the States, unless you count...

Thus the metric system did not really catch on in the States, unless you count...

Without question, the greatest invention in the history of mankind is beer. Oh, I grant...

Without question, the greatest invention in the history of mankind is beer. Oh, I grant...

My problem with chess was that all my pieces wanted to end the game as...

My problem with chess was that all my pieces wanted to end the game as...

There is a breed of fashion models who weigh no more than an abridged dictionary.

There is a breed of fashion models who weigh no more than an abridged dictionary.

You can only be young once. But you can always be immature.

You can only be young once. But you can always be immature.

Although golf was originally restricted to wealthy, overweight Protestants, today it's open to anybody who...

Although golf was originally restricted to wealthy, overweight Protestants, today it's open to anybody who...

Once again, we come to the Holiday Season, a deeply religious time that each of...

Once again, we come to the Holiday Season, a deeply religious time that each of...

Camping is nature's way of promoting the motel business.

Camping is nature's way of promoting the motel business.

The Internet: Transforming Society and Shaping the Future Through Chat

The Internet: Transforming Society and Shaping the Future Through Chat

Gravity is a contributing factor in nearly 73 percent of all accidents involving falling objects.

Gravity is a contributing factor in nearly 73 percent of all accidents involving falling objects.

I regularly read Internet user groups filled with messages from people trying to solve software...

I regularly read Internet user groups filled with messages from people trying to solve software...

'Escargot' is French for 'fat crawling bag of phlegm'.

'Escargot' is French for 'fat crawling bag of phlegm'.

And computers are getting smarter all the time: scientists tell us that soon they will...

And computers are getting smarter all the time: scientists tell us that soon they will...

The Democrats seem to be basically nicer people, but they have demonstrated time and again...

The Democrats seem to be basically nicer people, but they have demonstrated time and again...

People who want to share their religious views with you almost never want you to...

People who want to share their religious views with you almost never want you to...

Never under any circumstances take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night

Never under any circumstances take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night

Nobody cares if you can't dance well. Just get up and dance.

Nobody cares if you can't dance well. Just get up and dance.

Auto racing is boring except when a car is going at least 172 miles per...

Auto racing is boring except when a car is going at least 172 miles per...

We'll try to cooperate fully with the IRS, because, as citizens, we feel a strong...

We'll try to cooperate fully with the IRS, because, as citizens, we feel a strong...