Genealogy, n. An account of one's descent from a man who did not particularly care to trace his own.

Quote by Ambrose Bierce

Topics: Ambrose Bierce Quotes

Philosophy: A route of many roads leading from nowhere to nothing.

Philosophy: A route of many roads leading from nowhere to nothing.

The slightest acquaintance with history shows that powerful republics are the most warlike and unscrupulous...

The slightest acquaintance with history shows that powerful republics are the most warlike and unscrupulous...

INFLUENCE, n. In politics, a visionary _quo_ given in exchange for a substantial _quid_.

INFLUENCE, n. In politics, a visionary _quo_ given in exchange for a substantial _quid_.

The future is that period of time in which our affairs prosper, our friends are...

The future is that period of time in which our affairs prosper, our friends are...

Bacchus, n.: A convenient deity invented by the ancients as an excuse for getting drunk.

Bacchus, n.: A convenient deity invented by the ancients as an excuse for getting drunk.

Mythology: the body of a primitive people's beliefs, concerning its origin, early history, heroes, deities...

Mythology: the body of a primitive people's beliefs, concerning its origin, early history, heroes, deities...

FORMA PAUPERIS. [Latin] In the character of a poor person --a method by which a...

FORMA PAUPERIS. [Latin] In the character of a poor person --a method by which a...

Barometer, n.: An ingenious instrument which indicates what kind of weather we are having.

Barometer, n.: An ingenious instrument which indicates what kind of weather we are having.

INSURRECTION, n. An unsuccessful revolution. Disaffection's failure to substitute misrule for bad government.

INSURRECTION, n. An unsuccessful revolution. Disaffection's failure to substitute misrule for bad government.

Lawsuit: A machine which you go into as a pig and come out of as...

Lawsuit: A machine which you go into as a pig and come out of as...

I never said all Democrats were saloonkeepers. What I said was that all saloonkeepers are...

I never said all Democrats were saloonkeepers. What I said was that all saloonkeepers are...

Telephone, n. An invention of the devil which abrogates some of the advantages of making...

Telephone, n. An invention of the devil which abrogates some of the advantages of making...

A miracle is an act or event out of the order of nature and unaccountable,...

A miracle is an act or event out of the order of nature and unaccountable,...

Age: that period of life in which we compound for the vices that we still...

Age: that period of life in which we compound for the vices that we still...

Mayonnaise: One of the sauces which serve the French in place of a state religion.

Mayonnaise: One of the sauces which serve the French in place of a state religion.

Coward: One who, in a perilous emergency, thinks with his legs.

Coward: One who, in a perilous emergency, thinks with his legs.

MONARCHICAL GOVERNMENT, n. Government.

MONARCHICAL GOVERNMENT, n. Government.

Congress seems to want to cure every ill known to man except unconstitutional government and...

Congress seems to want to cure every ill known to man except unconstitutional government and...

Perhaps the fact that we have seen millions voting themselves into complete dependence on a...

Perhaps the fact that we have seen millions voting themselves into complete dependence on a...

As governor of Texas, I have set high standards for our public schools, and I...

As governor of Texas, I have set high standards for our public schools, and I...